The mobile phone risks worsening our relationships

The screen occupies a very large place in many people’s lives today.
Now a new study shows that scrolling on the mobile affects our relationships negatively.
– Screen time, and in particular the fact that I am on my mobile, is connected to the weakening of the quality of the couple’s relationship and the shortening of the couple’s relationship. There is hard research on this, says Anna Rotkirch, initiator of the research project.

Have you been bothered by the fact that your partner would rather sit on the sofa and scroll on the mobile phone than talk to you? Then you are not alone. Far from.

According to a new study, from Finland’s Turku University, the mobile phone worsens our relationships. The results are clear, according to Rotkirch.

– These are big trends we are talking about, and you see it over time. After ten years, we are more likely to have divorced.

There is also a link between mobile phone use and jealousy, infidelity and the risk of divorce.

– When you’re on a screen, no one knows what you’re doing. If you read a newspaper or a book, you have an idea. But on the screen you have no idea. It increases mistrust, which breeds more jealousy, more conflicts and more suspicion in couple relationships.

“The essence is that we miss closeness”

For psychologist Anna Bennich, the results of the study do not come as a big surprise, and are something she notices in couple therapy. She has an explanation.

– What happens is that when we do things on our own phone, attention is reduced to other things and then we miss things and then there is frustration. The essence is that we really miss closeness.

She thinks the most important thing is to address when the phone becomes a problem in the relationship.

– This is something that usually creates problems and is not an unusual question these days. To understand that if you are constantly somewhere else, the relationship will weaken. We have to be able to have a balance in this. The mobile is so strong.

It is important to address the problem in time.

– It is very important to realize when things have gotten out of hand. Otherwise, it’s so hard to do anything about it. You are chosen.

Not just negative

However, mobile phone use in relationships does not have to be by definition only negative.

– There can also be positive things. You can send sexy text messages to each other during the day, you can have contact with relatives more easily and so on. There are lots of positive things, but it’s about how we relate, says Bennich.

Rotkirch agrees.

– Texting each other strengthens relationships. It’s very good that you can use the screens for that too.

However, it can be easy to slip into the negative.

– The whole of social media is like a big dating site. You constantly see other people who always look their best. It is a constant unconscious impulse that there are other people.

Anna Bennich:

– It is much more attractive to look at something than to look at your old partner with whom you have been hanging out.