Published on
Updated
Reading 3 min.
in collaboration with
Johanna Rozenblum (clinical psychologist)
Being happy is a useful quest! But to achieve this, we often have to give up little things that pollute our mind. Here are 8 habits to quit to achieve happiness!
What is happiness ? The question is vast and the answer is different for each of us, but it nevertheless implies a necessary and common path: that of refocusing on the essential and leaving aside the elements and faults that slow us down on a daily basis. Here are 8 renunciations to put in place, to be happier in life.
Chase away negativity
Do you see that little way that tells you everything will go wrong? Shut her up. And focus more on what’s going well in your day, as the authors of “Cultivating Optimism” advise.
Stay away from toxic people
Of course, you can be there for the loved ones who matter to you in the event of a hard blow. But some toxic or negative people only hurt you emotionally and drag you down. To flourish more, learn to get rid of these negative people and surround yourself with people who support you, inspire you or do you good.
Don’t aim for perfection
No one is perfect, not even people who seem to manage their career, their perfect family, their home decor, their social circle…. Seeking perfection would even be the best way to be constantly frustrated, by focusing on that detail that is not the way you would like it to be. Let go of the ballast: perfection is an ideal that you will never achieve (and that’s good!) and not reality.
Get rid of unrealistic expectations
Likewise, in real life, not everything can work perfectly the way we want it to and we cannot control others or all events. Our decisions must therefore take reality into account, so as not to be disappointed.
Stop comparing yourself
On social networks, everyone shares what highlights them the most. Result ? Many of us compare ourselves and perceive what is missing in us, in mirror image. But unsurprisingly, this constant competition harms good self-esteem. Stop looking at what others have, or what they’ve achieved (especially since pictures don’t give all the details), focus on your own progress and celebrate your personal successes.
Give up the fear of failure
The prospect of making mistakes should not prevent you from embarking on new projects that seem important to you. Failure, when it happens, is an opportunity to learn and go further. Renunciation, on the other hand, will bring you little satisfaction. The act of trying will always be more rewarding.
Detach yourself from the past
The past is formative. Events, both positive and negative, have taught you essential life lessons for the future. However, they should not hold you back. To move forward, arm yourself with what you have learned but avoid looking back. Happiness is found in the present and the future, not something that can no longer be changed.
Silence your self-criticism
Have you made a mistake in your journey? Learn a lesson from this too, but stop continually self-flagellation. Excessive self-criticism prevents you from moving forward and achieving what you want. On the contrary, learn kindness, forgive yourself and recognize your successes too. Putting self-criticism aside is the first step to experiencing more happiness in your life.
Good in his body, good in his head!
Johanna Rozenblum, psychologist: “Happiness is in the path more than in the result”
Thus, to have the right to happiness, we must above all allow ourselves to make mistakes and chase away this idea of perfection which slows us down more than it motivates us. A right to kindness confirmed by Johanna Rozenblum, clinical psychologist and member of our expert committee who regularly reminds many of her patients.
“The more rigid our idea of happiness, the more ultimately we set ourselves up for failure. The idea to repeat until you understand it is that, ultimately, this much sought-after happiness is found much more often in the path than in the result. So, accepting your emotions, even the most painful ones, facing a challenge and growing, trying, failing and getting back up… are not proof that you will never be happy. On the contrary, they are roads to happiness because we live things, whereas we do not live waiting for a performance which should supposedly signify happiness.
A necessary reframing to better appreciate each little happiness of everyday life.
Slide: 30 quotes about happiness