It all often starts with a testimony, that of a loved one, who evokes one elsewhere: a new job, another company. In short, another life. Forgotten the next moment or teasing like a grip that hangs on, these words mute in idea: in the imagination, we end up projecting ourselves. A prudent hypothesis that can quietly walk towards a conviction when you find out about this job which returns in an obsessive mantra or on this company that makes sense. But very often, we say that “it’s not the time”, invoking a thousand reasons to stay. And yet, these interior or exterior upsets may be a sign that it is time to start. This discomfort at work has a name: the “Maljob”, described by Valérie Duez-Ruff, author of Leave your job and negotiate your departure (Eyrolles, 2025), one of the symptoms of which is the “disalcranement” – loss of meaning, values, disharmony or dissonance.
Asking yourself is already answering it. Accepting it as a reality that is not chimerical is moving forward. Then analyze the situation and not silence your own, legitimate questions in order to be able to take the next step. “Sometimes, it only takes a simple position or responsibilities within the same company or the same group,” explains the lawyer in labor law. But in certain situations, it’s just impossible. “Do not exhaust yourself to head, you will pay dearly. In this case, go!”, She advises. Just before the big jump, an imperative: negotiate.
To leave is undoubtedly the most complicated question since it inevitably raises that of the good timing. “Do not wait for the ideal moment to act, it does not exist,” says Valérie Duez-Ruff. Beware of the whim, however: “an impulsive career change can lead to financial and professional difficulties”. To succeed in his departure, it is better to have a project. Its feasibility requires work of imagination, anticipation, contextualization and modeling. You also have to take into account your personal life, because changing work can induce changes or revolutions for yourself and your loved ones. It is essential to investigate, network or learn about your own methods. “Get to meet people, ask them … people love to speak, especially of themselves! The sum of precious information that you will collect will be considerable and will be very useful,” encourages the author. “By agreeing to welcome other possibilities, beyond your preconceived ideas, a different professional project and better suited to you can emerge”. Then comes the time of negotiation.
“Most people think that a negotiation begins when the discussion is committed. In reality, it begins first in our mind,” says Valérie Duez-Ruff. Knowing the “why” is essential, in the manner of Nietzsche: “He who has a ‘why’ who takes him place of goal can live with any” how “”. But that is not enough. The expert describes an analysis tool put in place to clarify her expectations before entering into negotiation: the POE, for position, objective and issue. “P” represents the posture displayed at the start of the negotiation. “O” corresponds to the objective set, the hope of gains. “E” is the issue. “The position (what we display) and the objective (which is tried to obtain by negotiation) can be adjusted throughout the negotiation, upward or downwards,” said Valérie Duez-Ruff. The stake, on the other hand, must be clearly defined: it is the floor below which it becomes impossible to carry out its project (for example, a private resignation of unemployment benefits). But there is also a median route, where the two parties come out of the top: a transaction and a mutual commitment of non-deception.
A “plan B” if negotiations fail
Finally, what period for discussions? “Time is an actor in the negotiation, too often forgotten, while he is major,” insists the lawyer. Exchanges can extend from 48 hours to six months, with an average duration of approximately one month. For an effective POE, it is of course necessary to bring together all the necessary documents, consider different options, get help if necessary and hold your family entourage in the current. It remains essential to provide a “plan B” in the event of negotiation failure. For Valérie Duez-Ruff, it’s the mesore (“”Best withdrawal solution “), or Batna in English (” Best Alternative to a Negotiated Agreement “, a strategy developed by the Americans Roger Fisher and William Ury so as not to find themselves in a weak position if the negotiation fails).
This “plan B” can take different forms: sign a promise to hire elsewhere and resign, change your jobs internally, follow a training to bounce back, or even rethink your arguments to negotiate again. A flip-flop is possible: the employer can evolve and accept departure under satisfactory conditions. Final hypothesis: do not close the door to a possible attractive counter-proposition on the part of the other party …
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