If walking around naked at home can be very pleasant, can you continue to do it when you have a child? If so, up to what age? How does he perceive his parents’ nudity? The answers of Dr Stéphane Clerget, child psychiatrist.
Is nudity normal between a parent and child?
As long as the child does not associate nudity with sexuality, this is not really a problem.
If we show ourselves naked in front of our child accidentally, because he enters the bathroom when we are there or in our bedroom while we are changing, there is nothing of dramatic. Better to take it with a laugh to avoid creating discomfort. Overall, as long as the child does not associate nudity with sexuality, this does not really pose a problem. “It is from the age of three that it begins to become exciting for him since there are the first oedipal emotions, the child begins to have a curiosity and laughs on the subjects of willies and zezettes. He notices what it’s like to be naked. He understands that when he goes to kindergarten everyone is clothed so he reacts when someone is naked”, develops Dr. Stéphane Clerget. Therefore, you must avoid showing yourself naked voluntarily in front of your child because this can disturb him and be considered by him as intrusive behavior, a breach of his privacy.. Later, he would risk having blocks with regard to nudity. It could also send her the message that consent when it comes to nudity doesn’t matter.
A child curious about his parents’ body: is this normal?
If the child is not the same sex as you, he may show some curiosity about your body because he notices that his genitals are different from yours. Contrary to what some parents might think, nudity has no instructive or pedagogical virtue.. On the contrary, it is especially likely to bother him! And for good reason, as Dr. Stéphane Clerget explains, “The parents’ body is the most beautiful and exciting thing for a child. There is no point in exciting it with our body”. In other words, in the eyes of the child, his parents are gods. However, in Greek mythology, we do not see the gods in their intimacy because it is too fascinating.
Is it more serious that a dad shows himself naked in front of his daughter than a mother in front of her son?
It is the term “to show oneself” which is awkward because it implies that it is voluntary
It’s no more serious that a dad shows himself naked in front of his daughter than a mom in front of her son. It is the term “to show oneself” which is awkward because it implies that it is voluntary. However, it is not the same thing if the child enters the room or the bathroom accidentally, in which case he surprises us, than if it is done on purpose. “In the mind of a child, nudity can constitute a call to sex. You must therefore be aware that it is not trivial and treat your child as a distinguished guest. You would not show yourself naked in front of her concierge so why in front of her child?”thus questions the child psychiatrist.
At what age should nudity between a parent and child reciprocally be prohibited?
There is no “prohibition”. From the age of 4, parents simply have to avoid getting naked in front of their child. “The important thing is above all that the parents do not show themselves naked in front of their child. In the other direction, it is the child who decides, and if we are modest, he will become so himself “, argues the childhood specialist. Some children begin to be modest around 7-8 years old, but not necessarily systematically. They generally become so at the age of the first hairs.
Thanks to Dr Stéphane Clerget, child psychiatrist in Paris