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Reading 2 min.
in collaboration with
Siyana Mincheva (Psychologist, psychotherapist)
In love, it is essential to meet the right person to establish a healthy relationship. But unfortunately, this does not happen to you and on the contrary, you have the impression of coming across the wrong person every time. How can this be explained? Psychologist Siyana Mincheva lifts the veil on the reasons for these successive failures.
In love, you think you are unlucky. Almost all of your relationships have ended in failure. But why do you always attract the wrong person? Psychology can definitely explain this situation.
The first reason is unresolved childhood trauma
Unresolved childhood trauma is the number one reason people make poor choices in love. In fact, childhood experiences shape our understanding of relationships and can leave emotional scars.
“A wound can be reopened after having been in a romantic relationship during which one realizes that the chosen partner is very similar to what one wishes to avoid” confirms Siyana Mincheva.Despite everything, the person will continue the relationship, thus accentuating the feeling of affective dependance“.
For the expert, getting out of this kind of relationship is possible. You have to learn to know yourself to heal from your past wounds.And for that, you have to learn to bring yourself the essential, that is to say self-love and self-respect.” recommends the psychologist.
The second reason is low self-esteem
Having low self-esteem usually leads to choosing the wrong partners in one’s love life.”Believing that one is unworthy of being loved and having a negative self-image generates the acceptance of abusive behavior from one’s partner.” says our expert.
“It is important to learn to constantly value yourself, to learn to love yourself unconditionally without self-judgment or self-criticism because this leads to self-sabotage of your relationship, often involuntarily.” she warns again.
The third reason is the fear of being alone.
Finally, fear of loneliness can push some people to accept relationships that do not suit them.The fear of the solitude is linked to the wound of abandonment and to emotional dependence too” finally details Siyana Mincheva.
“In order to combat this fear, it is important to learn to assert yourself. Assert yourself first with yourself and then with any person or situation that threatens to harm you. blossoming personal. To assert oneself means: knowing how to respect oneself, knowing how to know oneself and knowing how to love oneself” she concluded.
Slide: 10 Signs You’re in a Toxic Relationship