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When we raise a child, above all we want to pass on our values to them. But be careful, because we sometimes also share bad habits with them, which can make them more selfish as adults.
You probably know: beyond the way in which we educate a child, our behavior towards him plays a primordial role in his development. Thus, certain mistakes made by parents lead to more selfish children as adults, according to Dr. Traci Baxley, parenting coach. Here are the ones.
Give in to all demands
All parents love their children and some sometimes have difficulty setting limits for their little ones. However, adopting this attitude is not doing them any favors, far from it. Indeed, children who are never said no are less empathetic towards others, certain studies show.
Do not teach them gratitude and a taste for effort
Saying yes to everything a child asks does not teach him gratitude. Teaching a child that they have to make an effort to obtain something, saying thank you when they receive what they want… So many essential values to pass on to them, so that they are grateful for what they have.
To do this, the specialist gives advice: install a whiteboard on which a question is asked every day on the themes of thanks and gratitude. This allows children to be questioned and spark discussion and questions around these essential values.
Do not repeat inappropriate behavior
To explain this, Dr. Traci Baxle cites an example: If you hear one of your children insulting their brother or sister, you should intervene by saying “IYou feel this or that feeling when you talk to your brother in this way. Being nice to your brother is a rule in our house. Telling him this is unacceptable and has consequences.”. Because we don’t think much about it, but our children observe the way we react to situations.
Not being generous yourself
In the same way, our dear little ones observe the way we behave on a daily basis. To avoid having selfish children, it is essential not to be selfish yourself. Also, show them that you convey values of mutual aid and cohesion with others, whether friends or family. It’s still the best way to inspire your children and invite them to adopt the same behavior.
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