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It’s hard to know when you meet someone whether your new romance is meant to last or not. But there are a few clues in the first few weeks (or months) that your partner isn’t interested in committing. Be careful not to get hurt.
He’s handsome, interesting, funny… But is this man you just met ready to commit to you, or is he likely to disappoint you and break your heart? While it’s impossible to predict what your story will turn out to be, the magazine Your Tangoa relationship specialist, does highlight some telltale signs of a man who is likely to let you down and make you cry.
He never calls you his “girlfriend”
It’s simple, really. If a man doesn’t consider you his girlfriend, and doesn’t introduce you as such to his entourage, you’re not his girlfriend and you never will be. A hard truth to accept, but a useful one.
He doesn’t meet your family
A man who doesn’t want to really take a chance on you will avoid meeting your family. Why? Because he doesn’t want to expose himself (or you) to an awkward situation, in which your parents will inevitably ask questions (while he doesn’t know if he’ll still be there in a week). In short, he wants to spare himself.
He doesn’t make plans with you
In your relationship, if you are the only one making plans, whether it is for a long-term trip, or even for Saturday night, and your partner never follows up or never suggests anything, it is still a bad sign. Either he will show up like a flower, or you will wait a long time for him. But you deserve a person who also wants to work with you.
He tells you he’s not ready for a relationship
Don’t make excuses (he’s not ready right now because he’s coming out of a relationship, or because he’s working a lot right now…). If a man tells you he’s not ready for a relationship, or that he doesn’t think he’s “in the mood”, believe him! If he also lists his past failures, and what a terrible boyfriend he can be, believe him too. You’ll avoid predictable pain.
There is a difference between being cordial and on good terms with your exes (which can be a sign of maturity) and always being ambiguous, close to your exes, or even keeping them in your everyday life. If this is the case, you may not get the place you expected.
He talks to you too much about the future (without making anything concrete)
The smooth talker will tend to make you believe in beautiful things (a beautiful trip for two, an unforgettable experience, the place where you could be happy…) but does not make anything concrete on a daily basis, and does not treat you like his girlfriend with his friends. In short, he is just trying to keep you for himself, without really committing.
He uses gaslighting
The problem in this case is not the absence, or lack of involvement of a man, but his way of acting with you, especially if he uses gaslighting. If from the beginning of a relationship you discover that this new partner does not recognize your emotions, that he calls you “crazy” when you express yourself, or that he questions all your ways of being, run away. Because you will hurt yourself.
He’s dating someone else
This may seem obvious, but the situation is still common: a man who is already married, or in a relationship, has every chance of breaking your heart. Because this kind of love triangle can last indefinitely, without bringing you any stability or possible future.
Slideshow: Breakup: 8 signs that show the couple is over