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Teaching your child to find their place and defend their rights in a group is neither easy nor quick. But according to a child psychologist, there are a few phrases to teach them from early childhood to assert themselves.
If there is one difficult thing in parenting, it is seeing your young child confronted with others, sometimes older, who will make life difficult for them. When they are left out, rejected, or not given toys, our parental hearts force us to intervene. But according to Jaimie Bloch, aka @mindmoverspsych on Instagram, a child psychologist, it is never too late to also teach your child to defend themselves and set their own limits. Yes, starting in daycare.
5 phrases to have your child repeat so that they find their place
According to the psychologist, there are five important sentences to teach your child to help him build his self-confidence. And serve as a basis for what he accepts or not.
- “It’s my turn, I’ll give it to you when I’m done”;
- “I don’t like being called that. I want you to call me by my name”;
- “You are responsible for your body and I am responsible for mine”;
- “I’ll find someone else to play with”;
- “I will ask (name of responsible adult) to help us.”
Of course, these are not magic phrases that will solve everything in a few seconds. But they are phrases that set a framework and should help him assert himself.
Train him gently, as a parent
The expert takes the opportunity to remind us that the goal is to teach children to express their ideas and needs more in all social situations. But the result will not be seen instantly.We can’t expect them to know how to do this, so we need to help them develop these skills.”
Learning these defense phrases is therefore a first step, but the psychologist also talks about support, as an equally important piece of information. She gives us her valuable advice on how to achieve this:
- Remember that it takes practice and patience on the part of parents to be assertive and help children find their voice;
- Don’t push your children if they don’t feel comfortable or ready. It took my daughter a full year to find her voice again;
- If your child is not ready, let him know that you believe in his ability to express himself and assert himself.
In the meantime, they can practice this skill with you at home! This means letting your child express their boundaries and having them heard and respected.