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Starting a family is pure joy, but the journey is also strewn with pitfalls. And if no one is there to help us, parenting can then turn into a real ordeal. According to parenting expert Calvina Ellerbe, three things are particularly difficult for new parents.
Becoming a parent is a real challenge. In addition to having to take up the challenge, three elements are often difficult to live with for these young families, according to Calvina Ellerbe, a parenting expert interviewed by Psychology Today.
Advice received without being asked
If you have been pregnant, you have probably experienced this: some people around you will not hesitate to give you their “advice”, without you even asking for it. They will have their opinion to give on feeding the future baby, how to carry him, how to organize yourself, whether to let him cry, his education in general… So many choices which fall first and foremost to the parents (and to them). alone!), according to their principles and the values they wish to instill in their child.
“When I was a child, it was different”
This is probably the phrase you’ll hear all the time about raising your children. Education is a personal subject, specific to each person. Some wish to take up the educational values they received, in order to pass them on to their children, others will on the contrary want to do the opposite… Be careful not to let yourself be polluted by these external pressures, advises the expert.
NO to diets, YES to WW!
A lack of daily support
Finally, an important point, Calvina Ellerbe underlines the individualism which is corroding our current societies. Between work, school, managing the home, parents (and often mothers) have an increased mental load, without being able to count on loved ones for help. A glaring observation, particularly during the postpartum period, just after childbirth, when the young mother needs support the most.
The expert also notes an increase in feelings of isolation and loneliness among parents since 2020. And recalls that it is important to ask for help from those around you, when possible.