Therefore the oldest child is the favorite of the parents

Do you suspect that your parents have an extra good eye for the family’s big sister? You may be right. According to research at two universities in the United States and Canada, it is precisely the oldest child, especially if it is a girl, who is the parents’ favorite.

The reason is that the oldest child is simply more mature and good at finding himself – which makes it easier for the parents.
– The child who is more properly and caring is easier to deal with. There will be less conflicts and less friction. So it will be easier for parents to favor that child, says psychologist David Waskuri.

Plays a role for future relationships

The role you have in the siblings can affect future relationships and feelings, says David Waskuri. Therefore, it is good for parents to be aware of family dynamics. It is especially important to be observant if there are feelings of injustice among the siblings.
– It is important to listen to all children, and really take it seriously if a child thinks it is unfair, and to see the needs of the different children and try to meet them. Then it doesn’t have to be a millimeter justice, but you should try to take it in, he says.

The stable feels forgotten

Another inequality between the siblings can arise if one of the children has mental illness.
– If that child gets a lot of attention, it can lead to the child who is self -sufficient and stable feeling forgotten, says David Waskuri.

The research is based on data from 19,000 people from the United States, Western Europe and Canada. And it’s important, Waskuri says.

– It is interesting that the child’s age, gender and personality affect how to treat the children. One of the reasons why it is so important is that feelings of injustice can really hurt the child who does not feel favored. It can give consequences throughout the life of self -esteem, for example, he says.