The 3 secrets of happy couples according to a psychologist

Does passion fade with the passage of time? Probably, due to biological and psychological reasons, but also routine, accumulated daily stress, workload. But this fall is not inevitable, according to Nicole K. McNichols, American psychologist and sexologist, who speaks in an article in Psychology Today. You still need to know the 3 main rules to keep the romantic spark alive. Advice, confirmed by science, to apply urgently if you care about your relationship.

Express your gratitude to your partner daily

The first secret is a story of gratitude to maintain. Research shows that couples who express gratitude cultivate higher levels of relationship satisfaction, but also sexual satisfaction. “One of the worst habits partners can fall into is succumbing to the desire to criticize or constantly make negative remarks to each other. It’s okay to raise concerns, but when communication in a relationship breaks down to the point where partners feel criticized and unappreciated, all the magic is lost.” explains the psychologist. The key to avoiding this? Note at least one thing every day that you appreciated from your partner, whether it be an effort, an attention, a reaction. “When we feel like our partners notice us and recognize our efforts, it builds trust and emotional intimacy” supports the expert.

Encourage each other in your personal initiatives

Staying connected and maintaining the stability of the couple should not be done to the detriment of external activities, which are important to everyone. Research shows that when couples independently pursue things they’re passionate about, whether it’s a job, a hobby, or a cause, the feelings of enthusiasm carry over into their relationship. “Happy couples manage to balance predictability and security with adventure and novelty.” When both partners take the time to honor each other’s interests and ambitions, they become slightly changed people each time but become more reconnected.

Give or restore priority to sexual intimacy

Certainly, an entire relationship cannot be cemented by sex, and sex will never repair a broken relationship. However, research shows that sexual satisfaction and relationship satisfaction are highly correlated. “Sex helps us connect emotionally and physically with our partners. It relieves stress and promotes intimacy” confirms the spychologist. Research also shows that couples who have sex once a week or more report being more satisfied with their relationship than couples who have sex less frequently. But how can you make your intimate moments a priority? The expert relies on several tips that lasting couples put into practice:

• Plan intimate moments (rather than waiting for it to happen);
• Take your time to create a conducive atmosphere;
• Stay curious and try new things (change of location, accessories, etc.).

Small, rather pleasant efforts that can allow your relationship to play overtime.

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