A year after her husband of 30 years passed away, Sara, who is in her 60s, created a profile on a dating site. There she met Diego from Portugal, who ran a successful business.
Diego’s daughter lived in Sweden and he also planned to move here. But first he had to finish a job in Dubai.
– He got in touch and had problems with his computer and had to order machines. Then he asked me if I could go into his bank to help him make the payment. And I did.
“He manipulated me”
After that, Diego claimed that he had been blocked from the bank due to unauthorized login in Sweden and therefore needed to borrow more money. Sara said she wanted a deal – and was put in touch with Diego’s lawyer.
When Sara finally realized that she had been cheated, she had lost almost six million kroner. The money came from a house sale and from large loans that she is now forced to pay off.
– He had manipulated me so much. I don’t understand today how I could do that. I don’t understand it.
Question your gut feeling
Since statistics began to be kept in 2019, the number of romance frauds reported to the police has increased by 33 percent. Last year, 1,318 cases were reported. But the dark story is believed to be large because many are ashamed that they let themselves be deceived.
The psychologist Christopher Chabris has written the book “Förd behind the light” which addresses the modern research on why we are deceived.
– The fraudsters take advantage of natural psychological reactions that normally help us make the right decision. But they stage events that mean that when we follow our instincts, it leads us to wrong decisions, says Christopher Chabris.
His tip to avoid being scammed is to question more.
– You have to fight against your gut feeling and slow down. Ask more questions and gather more information. And ask your friends what they think.
Police investigation not started
Sara has reported the fraud to the police. But almost two years later, the police have not yet begun to investigate the case due to a lack of resources.
Despite the shame, Sara chooses to tell about what she has been through.
– I have no hope that this will lead to my getting the money back. But if I can prevent another poor thing from happening to this, I’ll have done something.