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Amélie Boukhobza (Clinical psychologist)
This Saturday, June 15, in Courbevoie, a 12-year-old girl was the victim of gang rape because she “was Jewish”. An abominable crime, which raises many questions. One of which is difficult but nevertheless inevitable: how do the parents of the three boys indicted cope with the horror? How do you live with a child who has now done the unthinkable? Response elements.
The events took place last Saturday. In a square in Courbevoie (Hauts-de-Seine), a 12-year-old girl was tortured, insulted then raped by three teenagers, aged 12 to 13.
A rape aggravated by its anti-Semitic character
According to the police, if the young girl was targeted, it was because she was of Jewish origin.
“He asked her many questions about Israel, insulting her as a dirty Jew.”, specifies the hearing report of the young victim. “He hit him all over his body, threw him to the ground and pulled his hair..”
The 12-year-old girl then confirmed to the officers that she had been raped by two of the three boys.
Two of them “were indicted for aggravated gang rape and violence aggravated by the anti-Semitic nature of the attack.specify our colleagues from TF1.
The third boy, placed under the status of assisted witness, is currently in a youth judicial protection home.
“No one can be exonerated in the face of this unprecedented anti-Semitic surge,” commented on the social network the chief rabbi of France, Haïm Korsia.
For its part, the Women’s Foundationwanted to highlight the rise in anti-Semitism which is hitting the country.
“Rape is a tool of destruction in the service of hatred and when children rape children, it is also society as a whole which must ask itself the question of its responsibility in the face of violence, anti-Semitism and misogyny in work in our country.”
Trying to understand the influences “to prevent further incidents”
On this case, Amélie Boukhboza, psychologist, condemns the acts committed. But a question deserves to be asked: if the trauma is inevitable for the young girl and her family, what about the other parents? How to understand “the unthinkable“as the parent responsible for the perpetrators?
“We can always try to understand, try to hear… Very often the children and young adolescents who commit these heinous acts have themselves suffered from abuse. But that in no way excuses them,” she recalls.
She also affirms that the act did not appear out of nowhere: it was necessarily influenced.by an external cause“. Which, by its anti-Semitic character, goes beyond the scope of rape as such.
“As a parent, we feel a surge of shock, pain, shame, despair when faced with our child who has done the worst. These emotions, which are legitimate, must be treated otherwise they will become destructive,” she warns. “The idea being to find the most soothing path possible, by forgiving without excusing your child.” “In this case, the three young people boys were obviously influenced. You must therefore try to understand the influences (family, friends, etc.), the motivations of your child and get involved to prevent other incidents.”
According to the expert, psychological support is completely “essential” for the accused child, but also for the parents. A specialist in violence must be arrested in order to “deal with the emotions that are involved” and to get through this crisis as best as possible.
“The child must be taken care of, to understand and measure the weight of his actions. Enrolling him in an educational program seems essential“, assures the specialist, before adding “It is also necessary to educate, empower and raise awareness among the family as a whole. Take stock of the ideas conveyed and circulating there. All these dimensions must be taken into account“, concludes the expert.