Eat less sweets, spend fewer hours on social media, exercise at least three times a week – that’s what typical New Year’s resolutions might sound like.
But it’s not always easy to keep them, especially if we go out too hard.
– One risk with going all-in is that it will be difficult to sustain in the long run, says psychologist Anna Bennich.
As the new year approaches, many make resolutions around things like health, relationships and finances.
– There is some research that indicates that such a milestone for change can be helpful in getting started with a new habit, says psychologist Anna Bennich.
At the same time, it can be difficult to change a behavior. There are advantages to soft-starting instead of following the “cold turkey” method, says Anna Bennich.
– That is quite individual, whether you work well with breaking something completely or making changes step by step. One risk with giving the iron completely is that it may feel too difficult to maintain in the long run, especially if the new behavior involves major changes in everyday life.
Formulate “proximity goals”
There is also a risk that promises create anxiety and negative feelings if they are too strictly worded and linked to self-loathing.
– Avoid promises that make life more boring, or that mean all or nothing. It’s the small steps that are easiest, screwing up a bit rather than completely changing.
Anna Bennich believes that it is more motivating to formulate what is called an “approach goal”, where you decide what you want to achieve, instead of being locked in ending things.
– Instead of “stop eating sweets”, which feels like an incredibly strict and boring promise in my opinion, you can make the promise “eat more fruit and vegetables every day”.
This is how you avoid giving up
To avoid giving up on his promises, Bennich has three tips. The promise should be self-chosen – it is you and no one else who should want to achieve it. It must also be realistic, i.e. possible to achieve. And it must be possible to divide it into sub-goals.
– It is good to notice that you are heading in the right direction.
Finally, she points out that it is perfectly okay to refrain from New Year’s resolutions.
– If New Year’s resolutions feel heavy and have mostly led to feelings of failure, a good resolution might be to have no New Year’s resolutions at all. It is perfectly possible to live a good life without them.