Closeness, tenderness and desire.
These are some of the things men address in a new book that now exposes men’s sexuality.
– They had no inhibitions and I think they were very generous in sharing their experiences, she says.
In the new book “Naked – his most intimate”, 21 men of different ages reveal their innermost thoughts about love, lust and eroticism.
Now author Åsa Kalmér talks about the similarities between the sexes’ longing for closeness – and about the men’s need to talk.
– They had no inhibitions and I think they were very generous in sharing their experiences, she says.
Similarities greater than differences
A prejudice that turned out to be incorrect was that there are more similarities than differences between the sexes. Åsa Kalmér explains that the similarities are seen in the form of finding strategies to meet your desire and the needs you are born with, something that accompanies you throughout your life.
She describes that today it is easier to find these strategies in Sweden than before as society is being modernized.
– Perhaps it is a movement forward now that we are actually approaching each other on several points – both as gender and in the rest of society. Instead of pointing out differences, perhaps the similarities are stronger.
Skin contact and proximity important
In the book, the men testify to the longing for closeness – something that is not really that different from women, she believes.
– It is the skin contact and closeness that we want. I think it has to do with the first experience you have with your mother and father and the close skin-to-skin contact when you are a baby, she says and continues:
– You try to find the ultimate skin contact again.
“Obviously we’re not talking about sex”
In conversations with the men that Åsa Kalmér meets, the need to talk about sex and intimacy is felt, and she now hopes that the book can inspire those who read it.
The hope is also that the book can increase recognition but also encourage talking more about the subject as it can open up conversations.
– It’s quite obvious that we don’t talk about sex – especially when we enter family life.