Former farmer and candidate in season 15 of L’Amour est dans le pré, Mathieu Ceschin has become a solo dad. GPA, neurodegenerative disease, birth of Ezio… He tells us about the long journey which allowed him to welcome his son, and which transformed his life.
Father of a little Ezio born last May after a surrogacy in Colombia, Mathieu Ceschin is a happy man despite a neurodegenerative disease diagnosed in 2020. Delighted by the birth of his baby after years of waiting, the former farmer is transformed and sees life in rosy colors as he tells it in the book “My fight to become a father” (Ed. Leduc)! We spoke with this young dad with extraordinary energy who is mobilizing to change mentalities on surrogacy, homosexuality, single-parent and same-sex parent families.
You write in your book that at 16 you wanted to become a father when you became a godfather. For what ?
Matthew Ceschin. I already knew at the time that boys attracted me, but I also knew that I would be a different dad, that I would have my own child, that I would raise him and take care of him no matter what. . At the age of 27, I almost had a child with an associate, but it ultimately didn’t happen.
This desire for fatherhood will strangely resurface when you go through a complicated period financially…
Mathieu Ceschin. At the time, I was managing restaurants and earning 12,000 euros per month. But overnight, I only had the RSA. Financially it was very complicated, but I was very happy during that time. When you are deprived, you refocus on the essentials, and I realized that the essentials were not money, but life, and my future child.
You learn in 2020 that you have Cadasil disease, a neurodegenerative disease. Why did you decide to carry out this project despite everything?
Mathieu Ceschin. It’s very complicated, even for a bulldozer like me, to learn that you have an illness and that overnight you can leave. But ultimately this disease saved my life, because it showed me what it really was. I was very struck by the television appearances of Olivier Goy who has Charcot’s disease. In his book (Invincible: behind the smile, the fight of a life), he writes that even if he only has three years left, he knows that he will live them to the fullest and with greater depth. This is exactly what I tell myself: life will be even more beautiful because it will be more intense.
You then participated in season 15 of Love is in the Meadow where you met Alexandre with whom you decided to have a child. You turn to Ukraine to use a GPA, but you give up on it. For what ?
Mathieu Ceschin. GPA is very commercial in Eastern countries. On the other hand, the war in Ukraine complicated everything. But I have a friend who told me about countries in South America where surrogates are called life carriers. They practice a form of GPA that I call ethical and which suits me.
Your husband then left. Why did you decide to continue the adventure without him?
Mathieu Ceschin. Alexandre reassured me about the illness and, when he left me, I asked myself what I should do. But my neurologist told me that we could select an embryo that would not carry the disease. He advised me to go for it!
In June 2023, you meet Ame, your Colombian life carrier on video for the first time. How did this first exchange go?
Mathieu Ceschin. The exchange did not last very long, because she is a primary school teacher and was surrounded by children. But we immediately had a very good feeling and even a laugh! Ame already has two children. She always loved being pregnant and the arrival of Ezio brought this family together. Her children aged 9 and 4 began to take care of their mother like never before.
“My heart and my stomach were pierced”
How did Ame’s delivery go?
Mathieu Ceschin. We had a laugh with Ame when she was in the work room. That’s when Ezio decided to show up. I stopped laughing in the next thousandth of a second and my heart and stomach were pierced. Karine (The Merchant) told me: “For us mothers, love grows slowly in the pit of our bellies for nine months; at home, dads, it invades you all at once.”
You left the maternity ward alone with your son: were his first days of life complicated?
Mathieu Ceschin. The little one was disturbed. He had remained for nine months in the stomach of a person whom he no longer heard, no longer saw and no longer felt. So I had to overcompensate for the absence of Soul. Women have nine months to become mothers, but this is not the case for men. We lived in isolation with Ezio and I didn’t sleep for 10 days. I looked horrible! I cried dozens of times, but I turned into a wolf for my son!
What has fatherhood given you?
Mathieu Ceschin. I am transformed and I have incredible patience. I have developed resistance to any challenge because I continue my work while being alone with my son. I decided to introduce Ezio to the world and homeschool him when he is older. Above all, I want to teach him about life differently!