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Amélie Boukhobza (Clinical Psychologist)
Having just made their relationship official, Marc Lavoine and Adriana Karembeu are the subject of harsh criticism. The cause: the singer’s attitude, deemed a bit too demonstrative. But how can we explain such an outpouring of reactions? Here is our expert’s answer.
On Wednesday, September 18, Marc Lavoine and Adriana Karembeu made their relationship official during a Parisian party by exchanging several languorous kisses in front of the photographers. A demonstration of affection, which was not to everyone’s taste. Saying they were “shocked” and “disturbed” by this attitude, Internet users quickly reacted. But how can we explain that a simple kiss can shock so much? We asked the question to Amélie Boukhobza, clinical psychologist.
A Kiss That Disturbs
On social media, the hot kiss given by Marc Lavoine to his new girlfriend is causing controversy. While some Internet users accuse him of being heavy and insistent towards Adriana Karembeu, others, like Antoine Goretti, accuse him of “objectifying” the Slovak model and actress.
According to the influencer, the singer’s affectionate behavior would indeed suggest that he considers his partner as a “trophy wife”. A term, quickly taken up by many Internet users… wrongly? Amélie Boukhobza, clinical psychologist, strives to analyze this wave of revealing reactions.
“Ah desire, it always provokes reactions…! Contrasting or not, but it provokes a reaction. So why does this kiss shock so much? There is in our society a sort of permanent tension between desire and something of the order of decency, modesty… morals. On the one hand, hypersexualized images invade popular culture, on the other, real expressions of desire, especially between public figures in particular (but not only), often trigger a feeling of unease”, recognizes the practitioner.
“Perhaps the problem is not so much in the act of showing love, but in the way it resonates with cultural norms that, on the surface, advocate freedom, but, deep down, retain a certain modesty tinged with morality… ditto for topless on the beach or the increasingly strict internal regulations on the “decency” of clothing…” she further details.
The public scene also reinforces this duality.
“On the one hand, we want celebrities to be authentic, to show themselves without filters. But when they do, they are quickly caught and judged for an excess of passion or sensuality. So it probably reflects a part of persistent puritanism, where desire is considered as something that must be tamed, channeled in private, and not displayed in broad daylight,” says the expert.
An overflowing desire that was widely criticized… which was nevertheless validated by some. Kelly Vedovelli, columnist for Touche pas à mon poste, thus wanted to support the young couple, who seem to have asked nothing from anyone, except… to love each other.
“Can we let people be happy?” she got carried away like this.
Passionate kiss: what this gesture says about our society
For Amélie Boukhobza, it is not so much the gesture that shocks, but what it reveals.
“It’s the idea that desire, passion, can be so alive, so vibrant, even in a world where everything is often controlled, measured.” she emphasizes.
Does this make our society a puribund society?
“Maybe not totally. But there is probably a form of deep unease with what is too intense, too true. A kind of fear that desire, if shown without restraint, will reveal what many prefer to keep under control or silent. So it is not so much desire that shocks, but rather the freedom with which some choose to express it…”, analyzes the practitioner.
Does love always triumph?
Faced with such a wave of criticism – following, let us remember, a simple kiss – one can only wonder. Should we hide, sweep love away in the public space, this feeling that has made so many dream?
No, our expert is indignant.
“We must not forget that the kiss is the symbol of love. In art, it has always been a source of inspiration. Just think of Klimt’s “The Kiss”, one of the most reproduced works in the world, or the famous photograph by Robert Doisneau, “The Kiss at the Town Hall”, which continue to fascinate and make us dream. Lovers and others, by the way…”,
So why then be offended when this same gesture is expressed in reality, under the spotlight or in the street?
“We should not allow ourselves to slowly slide towards a form of censorship by trying to control everything. If kissing is accepted in public spaces, it is because there is a consensus around its legitimacy, its beauty!” she recalls the expert in conclusion.
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