Mamy, grandmother, grandmother, mamichou, there are as many grandmothers as there are ways to call them. Discover with a psychologist what the nicknames given to grandparents reveal.
Grandparents occupy a special place in the lives of children. More available than parents, they are confidants, playmates. They transmit, share, collect secrets. In some families, grandparents are called grandpa and grandma, in others grandpa and grandma. In still others, the grandmother is called by her first name or the grandpa by an affectionate nickname. Sometimes grandparents set the rules, but sometimes grandchildren decide for themselves. But in reality this choice is not a coincidence and says more than one might think.
“The other is a mirror of ourselves. Thus, we identify who we are through the way others look at us.“, recalls Ilana Waserscztajn, psychologist. We therefore understand why some women refuse to be called “grandma”, or worse, “grandma”. “When they hear this, the person is immediately reminded of the idea that they are an old person, that they are getting older.observes the psychologist. Even when this name comes from a much-awaited grandchild and the new grandmother is delighted to welcome him. Conversely, a grandmother may feel valued in her role because she is given a nickname (mamoune, mamoue, mamounette, daddychou etc.). “This establishes a relationship of closeness and intimacy. This nickname tells her that she is the best grandmother“, explains Ilana Waserscztajn.
The psychologist specifies that the choice of name given to grandparents also depends on family traditions. “A grandmother who had a grandmother with whom she got along very well, who remembers with emotion that she cooked with her, told her stories, will want to find that again. There is a melancholy side of a period that we wish to rediscover“, analyzes Ilana Waserscztajn. But to other ears, the word “grandma” will be associated with an old grandmother dressed in black, an austere and distant woman. A distance which can also be voluntarily established when a grandparent wants to be called by his first name.Some parents and grandparents insist on being called by their first name. Here again, it is a question of the fear of aging and the gaze of others”explains the psychologist. There is in this choice a form of detachment, of coldness where giving a little nickname speaks on the contrary of intimacy and closeness.
Also, in the majority of cases, we add the first name after the nickname for simplicity, so as to differentiate the maternal grandma or grandpa from the paternal grandparent. Many of our elders therefore call themselves “Mamie Martine” and “Mamie Michelle” so as to quickly make the child understand which granny we are talking about. So, what nickname did you choose to call yourself or your grandparents by?