There is no real age to become a mother, as long as nature allows it and the pregnancy goes well. But with a 40-year gap, Marie sees the future differently than if she had had her child younger. Testimony.
More and more women are prioritizing their studies or career before conceiving their first child. For some women who are already mothers, it is a new love that rekindles the desire to have a child, while for others, the right life partner was slow to appear, thus delaying the age of motherhood. This is the case of Marie, who met the future father of her child at the age of 38 and who became pregnant a year later. Although she experienced gestational diabetes during her pregnancy and a cesarean section at delivery, everything went very well. “I celebrated my 40th birthday when my son was 2 months old, so we are 40 years apart. I’ll be retired when he’s in his twenties.” she tells us. Marie still sees the positive side of becoming a mother at 40. “We have the necessary maturity, the patience and the knowledge not to panic at the slightest baby crying, and above all, I think that I dared to put the kibosh on the sometimes intrusive in-laws, something that I will not have been able to do before”. If everyday life with baby doesn’t seem that different from other mothers, and although the nights are short and the fatigue is very present, she enjoys every moment and is aware of the joy of seeing her baby grow.
In addition to fatigue and energy, certain questions inevitably arise, and they are very different from those asked by young mothers who have their first child at a younger age, at 25 or 30 years old for example. “I often get scared thinking about the future. I tell myself that his father and I should be in as good shape as possible so as not to leave him alone and see him grow as long as possible. Since birth, we have imposed a much healthier lifestyle: we started exercising again, we stopped smoking and we eat a more balanced diet.“, she confides. And out of the question of being considered the “grandmother” when going to drop him off or pick him up from school! “I hope he won’t be ashamed of his graying-haired mother when he gets to middle school!“Finally, due to the age-related decline in fertility and the risk of complications during pregnancy, becoming a mother after the age of 40 also involves a risk of not having more, if you do not decide quickly For now, her son Malo is only 13 months old, and there are no plans for baby number 2 in the works, but she sometimes wonders if he will grow up with a sibling, or as a child. unique.
Whatever it is, it’s often all in your head. And then, during all these years of celibacy, Marie took the opportunity to visit the world, and she will be able to organize other trips when she has more time, from the age of 64, with her son who has become an adult (if he still agrees to go with his “old” parents). At this age, she will also be available to support him according to his needs in the steps of his adult life (studies, driving license, apartment, etc.). “Growing old alongside her will undoubtedly rejuvenate me, so let’s take advantage, like all mothers over 40, of this gift of life!”concludes the young mother.