Published on
updated on
Reading 2 min.
in collaboration with
Amélie Boukhobza (Clinical psychologist)
Couples arguments are inevitable. However, certain words help prevent a conflict from escalating and ease tensions. Here are 8 phrases that happy couples say in these moments.
In love, it is important to communicate and invest in your relationship. But you shouldn’t imagine that this will make all the arguments disappear! But don’t panic, if you know how to communicate with your partner, these small conflicts can allow the couple to emerge from it.
More than 300 arguments per year for couples!
According to an English study on the subject, couples argue on average 312 times a year. Household chores, mental load, raising children, homework, shopping, bills… There are many areas of contention. So how can you maintain the bond with your partner, despite the difficulties of everyday life? According to Claire Fradet, life coach specializing in couple relationships and founder with her partner Anthony of the platform @YesWeBloom, here are the phrases that we should say more to others, on a daily basis.
“I understand you”
“It’s a pleasant phrase, which marks listening, an essential basis of the couple. It validates the feelings of others, even without necessarily sharing them” analyzes psychologist Amélie Boukhobza.
“I’m lucky to have you.”
By saying these words, you “recognize the value of your partner, their uniqueness” explains our expert. “It’s a true declaration of love! It implies the importance of being able to count on this ideal partner for you…”.
“I can’t fix this, but I’m here for you.”
Once again, this sentence shows listening to the partner. “It also allows you to admit your limits while offering unconditional support and attentive presence to others. And it helps ease its burden, even without an immediate solution. Supporting your partner is important” she emphasizes again.
“I don’t want to make assumptions, you can explain to me”
This phrase encourages an exchange and avoids misunderstandings. “It shows that we are ready to open a discussion at the same time as a desire to really understand the other, rather than appearing to know everything. And avoid projecting your own interpretations onto others, a frequent trap in conflicts.”
“I need some alone time, I’m not at my best right away”
Our expert encourages this honest attitude. “Rather than being in an unpleasant mood for the other, which could risk degenerating into conflict, it prevents unnecessary tensions. It also marks the awareness that one’s bad mood can cause pain to others.“. A healthy approach, in the end.
“What can we decide to prevent this problem from happening again?”
This sentence suggests an apprehension of the conflict and a shared reflection on possible solutions. “It also shows shared responsibility in the relationship.” notes Amélie Boukhobza.
“I believe in you”
This affirmation supports the other’s self-confidence and shows unwavering support. “This can be particularly motivating and reassuring, especially in times of doubt or challenge.”
“I see it’s important to you.”
This sentence, finally, allows us to recognize the other, their priorities and their feelings. “It also shows that we know him, that we are attentive to his needs. This validates the other’s emotions and reinforces the feeling of being valued and understood.” she concludes.
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