Composer Stefan Nilsson died a year ago. In the SVT documentary “Min död är min” he tells that he had chosen to take his own life because of ALS – a disease that weakened his muscles and caused his previously damaged hip to ache so much that he had to be put to sleep at night.
– He lay and screamed at night, “oh, let me die!” even though he was sedated, says Lotta Hasselquist Nilsson.
The documentary began filming just months after the illness notification he received in February 2023. The ALS quickly broke down his body and on May 25 of the same year he died at home in his bed. Two women had then come to his home with a potion that he himself could drink to kill himself.
After Stefan Nilsson’s death, the police started an investigation and his home was considered a crime scene. However, the police investigation was later dropped.
– He wanted his death to become a bat in the debate. That you should have the right to take your life if you have an illness like this and there is no hope whatsoever, says Lotta Hasselquist Nilsson.
“I, Stefan Nilsson, hereby decide to end my life… With my own contacts, I have acquired what I need to fall asleep peacefully.” On a piece of paper, Stefan Nilsson wrote that he didn’t want to live anymore. Photo: SVT
“A good title for my last film”
Tom Alandh, who had actually produced his last documentary for SVT, says that it still felt obvious to tell the story of Stefan and Lotta when he was asked by the couple.
– It feels incredibly great when a person asks if you can tell them how their life ends. And I think it’s a good title for my very last film.
– What stood out was the incredible love between Stefan and Lotta. I think I have hardly experienced that during my 54 years at work. It is not only a sad song but also a beautiful love story.
See My death is mine on SVT Play or on SVT 2 at 20.00 on Thursday 23 May.