You can’t imagine the immense impact that such an expression can have when said to a child.
In a playground, on social networks, in the street or in the course of a conversation, you have probably already heard or said this expression to talk about a person, a child. These two words are banal for some, while they can have an impact. In general, we hear them in schools, middle schools, high schools or discussion groups between young people. It is often students among themselves who use them, but some adults also use them in everyday life. As you may have guessed, the expression in question has nothing positive, it is pejorative, but above all, it is sexist and archaic.
This is the expression “tomboy”. A little girl plays with toy cars, dresses in baggy clothes, is interested in DIY or combat sports, so she is necessarily a “tomboy” since she seems to take on the appearance and behavior of a boy. That’s what many people say to themselves and that’s the whole problem. As soon as a little girl or a teenager moves away from the “feminine gender” and everything related to it, she is automatically put in the “unclassifiable boy” box. And as a bonus, she is judged, which has the gift of worrying parents. You only have to look at the Google searches associated with it: “What causes tomboys?”, “Is being a tomboy okay?”, “Is being a tomboy a phase?”, “Are tomboys rare?”
Behind this pronounced expression, there are also repercussions that are often ignored, especially among children searching for identity. First, it reinforces gender stereotypes and the idea that certain characteristics, behaviors or tastes are exclusively “feminine” or “masculine”. It sticks a label on the person and classifies them in a pejorative way. And that’s not all…
Psychologically, hearing these words spoken when you are a child is violent. It can have a negative impact on self-esteem, and over time, the child can feel excluded, or inadequate with his other peers of his age. The term “failed” also suggests that the person in question has failed to be a “real” girl, as if she needed to be corrected or that she was incomplete. However, this is totally false and absurd. Any child, regardless of his attitude, tastes and choices, is fine as he is and that is what makes him so rich!