A wise, obedient, serious little boy… But mute. During her first meetings with Tom*, in the premises of the Solidarité femmes Loire-Atlantique association, in Nantes, Lucie Leray did not really manage to grasp the character of this five-year-old child, so reserved that she wondered even if he has access to language. However, the social worker knows his file perfectly well: Tom arrived in this accommodation and social reintegration center (CHRS) a few days earlier, alongside his mother, who was brought to safety after being the victim of domestic violence. During yet another workshop, Lucie Leray suggests that the little boy project his shadow against a wall, and use stickers to show the places on his body that make him feel pain. “He expressed his anguish by placing these stickers on his stomach and his heart. He was not able to tell us what he felt, but he showed it to us. We then discovered a much darker side than the one he let appear.”
From this moment, the specialist works with her young interlocutor using figurines representing justice, the family, the law, uses colors to make him describe his emotions… “There was a lot of red, black, of anger and fear. As soon as we represented the family, he brought into the game a ferocious animal that devastated everything. It was through these kinds of techniques that we were able to understand what was going on in his head.” This very specific type of follow-up was carried out with 66 children within the Solidarité femmes Loire-Atlantique association in 2021. All were met through their mothers, victims of domestic violence and cared for by the CHRS.
“The majority cannot put words to what they have seen or experienced. Generally, these children also cannot control their emotions, have little resistance to frustration, some are even in a pattern of repetition, even clearly manipulated by the author of the violence”, describes Lucie Guerreiro, psychologist by training and social worker of the organization. For her, the choice of words is important. “They are not only ‘witnesses’ or ‘exposed’ to domestic violence. By the many physical and mental consequences that this violence has on them, they are indeed victims themselves, she summarizes. And justice must take aware of that.”
“Pretty intolerable delays”
The psychologist regrets too “limited” support for children co-victims of domestic violence by the courts. “We still see decisions that are too slow, with quite intolerable delays when talking about such violence. There are also a lot of inconsistent decisions, which focus more on the rights of parents than on those of children. Too often, these are still treated as the fifth wheel of the carriage.” In order to “better deal with” these cases, and to be able to obtain a “complete response” from justice for the victims, Prime Minister Elisabeth Borne rightly announced, on March 6, the establishment of approximately 200 “specialized poles” in domestic violence within the 164 judicial courts and 36 courts of appeal of the territory, which will treat these cases both on the civil level and on the criminal level, with a single file and dedicated hearings.
An “important” and “necessary” decision according to Karen Sadlier, doctor of clinical psychology and specialist in psycho-trauma in children. “We must pay particular attention to these cases, with trained and specialized magistrates and psychologists. Without this, too many child victims still slip through the cracks.” While in June 2021, a report of the High Council for Equality (HCE) estimated at more than 398,000 the number of children co-victims of domestic violence in France, the clinical psychologist recalls that these exposures to violence lead to serious disorders in children, which can be develop into adulthood.
“In 100% of cases, the child is the victim of psychological violence. In 80% of cases, he will be an eye or hearing witness to the violence. quarrel over parenthood”, list Karen Sadlier. “Children are at the heart of this violence, and the traumatic weight of this position is enormous. 60% of them will present with post-traumatic stress disorder.” According to the latest national study on violent deaths within the couple, published by the Ministry of the Interior in August 2021, the children were present during the feminicide of their mother in 17% of cases. And 12 children were killed in domestic violence cases in 2021.
The delicate question of parental authority
“This is one of the most serious mistreatments that can be inflicted on a child. Justice must react more quickly”, admits Edouard Durand, magistrate specializing in child protection issues and co-president of the Independent Commission on Child Protection. incest and child sexual abuse. On the penal level, the presence of the minor during the acts of conjugal violence is considered as an aggravating circumstance only since the law of August 3, 2018. The victim status of children has only been recognized since the decree of November 23, 2021, which provides that in the event of violence committed within the couple in the presence of a minor, the latter is also considered as a victim, and no longer as a simple witness to the facts, and can thus constitute a civil party. “Represented by an ad hoc administrator, the minor will then be able to assert his rights and benefit from any damages, which is a strong symbol”, explains Edouard Durand.
Advances in small steps, deemed still insufficient by the magistrate, in particular on the civil level – at the time of the separation of the couple before the judge for family affairs for example. “A crucial question then arises, which is that of parenthood. Unfortunately, in France, we tend to distinguish between conjugality and parenthood, as if violence could not go beyond the bubble of the couple and reach the child. As such, and despite the establishment of protection orders in certain cases, the withdrawal of parental authority from the violent spouse is not always mandatory. “However, we know that visitation rights are high-risk moments, both for the mother and for the child. We also know that in 40 to 60% of cases, the perpetrator also exercises physical violence on the child. child. Justice must go further, and provide for the systematic suspension of the parental authority of the aggressor parent”, considers the magistrate.
At the beginning of February, a bill to this effect, tabled by the socialist deputy Isabelle Santiago, was precisely adopted unanimously by the National Assembly. The text provides in particular that in the event of a conviction – even if not final – for willful violence against the other parent resulting in a total interruption of work of more than eight days and “when the child has witnessed the facts”, the author violence will see his parental authority automatically suspended. While the bill has yet to be examined by the Senate on March 21, Karen Sadlier is already hailing “a victory”. “Victims face constantly contradictory injunctions: they must flee the violent person and prove their dangerousness, but continue to meet them regularly to entrust them with their child… It makes no sense”, she argues, recalling also the importance of this measure for the psychological care of the child.
“Too many perpetrators still refuse, in the name of exercising their parental authority, to allow their child access to appropriate psychological care.” Especially since within the courts themselves, the specialist regrets that psychologists and psychiatrists are still “too little trained” in the matter. “Some have not had training on the subject for twenty years.” On March 6, Elisabeth Borne clarified that “additional resources” could be allocated to centers specializing in the fight against domestic violence, without giving further details.
*Name has been changed.