Do you think everything is going well in your relationship? These 5 signs prove otherwise

Do discussions with your partner only focus on upcoming shopping or childcare? Do you no longer want to share intimacy with him (or her)? In a word, you no longer feel connected to your partner? You may be in a relationship that is functional but devoid of love. Here are five signs, revealed by the American psychologist Mark Travers.

Your conversations are always practical, never personal

In a functional relationship, communication often remains surface level, with discussions mainly based on logistical questions: who can pick up the children from school? Take care of extending the machine? To prepare dinner? “These questions, although they are essential to the smooth running of a home, do not succeed in nourishing emotional intimacy or deepening the bonds between partners. explains the expert.

There is no emotional support, only cohabitation

The key to a healthy functioning couple is the mutual support that each spouse provides to the other. Partners reassure each other, listen attentively to each other’s concerns and react with empathy. This emotional exchange creates a feeling of security, because each partner knows they can count on the other during difficult times.

In a functional relationship without love, this support may be lacking. As a result, you may find yourself hiding this type of concern from your partner, instead relying on friends or family for support.

Intimate relationships are a chore

Physical intimacy – whether it’s hugs, kisses or regular sex – is the cornerstone of a healthy and fulfilling romantic relationship. “These physical exchanges allow a better connection between the couple and reinforce the emotional closeness felt.” assures the psychologist. In a relationship devoid of love, physical contact seems mechanical and more of an obligation.

You avoid solving your problems because “everything is fine”

In this type of relationship, the underlying problems are often not resolved because “everything is fine” on the surface. “The couple often has the impression that there is no point in shaking things up, because that’s how it works.” confirms Mark Travers. “However, this attitude tends to widen the gap that already separates spouses. he warns.

You feel alone, even when you’re together

Finally, perhaps the most telling indicator of a functional but loveless relationship is a pervasive feeling of isolation that persists even when you are physically in the same space. These couples share meals and activities, without any emotional connection. This paradox can be particularly discouraging, because it highlights the absence of real companionship in the couple.

What should you do if you recognize yourself in this situation?

Recognizing that you are in a functional but loveless relationship can be difficult, but it is an important first step.

Many couples go through phases where love takes a back seat to the demands of daily life. To begin to address emotional disconnection, take steps to rebuild intimacy, says psychologist Mark Travers. You can :

• Initiate open and honest conversations about your feelings. To do this, use “I” to communicate your experiences and needs and foster a non-confrontational atmosphere;
• Allow time for more in-depth discussionsvia a weekly meeting where you share your thoughts and emotions;
• Seek therapy—whether individual or as a couple—changing things can also be a solution. “A professional can help you explore these feelings, overcome your communication barriers, and develop strategies for a more fulfilling relationship” concludes the expert.

Slide: 10 signs that your relationship is balanced