COPENHAGEN Betinaa searched for two weeks. The inhabitants of the small island of Møn are typically introverted and do not particularly welcome people from outside the area. Now they searched forests, parks and city streets with their dogs to find the young woman who had moved from Copenhagen.
The breakthrough was finally made by the police. Betina’s body was found in her home, during the fourth search. To Betina’s childhood friend Wolf for Lerche the matter was reported among the first.
– There was a mattress with another mattress on top of it. In the mattress above, a male friend had carved a hole for my friend’s body and broke his bones so that the body could be stuffed into the mattress, Lerche says at his home in Store Heddinge on the island of Zealand.
The police found out that before hiding the body, the boyfriend had been driving the car at breakneck speed around the island, with Betina tied in a seat belt next to him. 97 injuries were found on the body of a 34-year-old woman.
– In court, the man looked sick. He was just lounging in the interrogation chair. When asked if he regretted what he had done, he said no, what’s done is done, Lerche recalls.
The court sentenced the perpetrator to eight years in prison, after which he will be deported to his native Poland.
Gender norms and gender roles persist in society
Denmark is for some studies (you switch to another service) according to Europe’s most violent countries for women, and it is slightly ahead of even Finland’s grim statistics.
In Denmark, every fourth homicide is related to intimate partner violence, and intimate partner violence is thus the most common cause of homicides in the country.
The latest from the Danish Ministry of Health and the University of Southern Denmark SDU research (you switch to another service) approximately 118,000 women and 83,000 men had experienced physical or psychological intimate partner violence within a year.
VIVE research center under the Danish Ministry of Health settlement (you switch to another service) from 2022 shows that almost a third of women and a good tenth of men have been exposed to physical, psychological or sexual partner violence during their adult lives.
However, according to both studies, the number of victims of intimate partner violence has fallen in recent years.
Psychological violence and stalking in the criminal law
A 150-year-old women’s shelter, now an organization called Danner, is located in the center of Copenhagen. Downstairs there are temporary living spaces for women who have fled domestic violence and their children.
Executive Director Mette Marie Yde says that the organization’s employees and volunteers see thousands of fearful and traumatized women every year. There is no single background factor for intimate partner violence, but there are some similarities in violent relationships.
– In our society, there are still certain gender norms and expectations about what men and women should be like, Yde says.
In many cases, intimate partner violence is passed from parents to children: If you have seen violence in childhood, you may get used to it, and it may not be considered exceptional. The same has also been noticed in men’s crisis centers.
Yde is satisfied with the fact that in recent years in Denmark, the issue has started to be talked about more and more boldly. Thanks are also due to the changes made to the criminal law, i.e. the consent law, the criminalization of emotional violence and the punishment for stalking.
1. In Denmark, the rape law defines, that if the person has not actively consented to sex, it is an act of violence. The consent-based law is two years old. In addition to Danner, others organizations (you switch to another service) praise the law. Surveys (you switch to another service) according to more and more people want to make sure even better that their partner is really willing to have sex. Likewise, awareness of the limits of rape has increased.
A similar law change entered into force in Finland at the beginning of 2023.
2. Psychological violence is criminalized, which means you can get the same punishment as physical violence: fines or a maximum of three years in prison. Even in Finland, you can be punished for mental violence if there is evidence of it and its consequences.
3. Persecution, i.e. “stalking”, is now a punishable act. A fine or a maximum of three years’ imprisonment can also be imposed for that. There has been persecution in Finland crime (you switch to another service) since 2014.
While there have been fewer cases of intimate partner violence reported than before, there have been more reports of rapes and punishments given for them more (you switch to another service). According to NGOs, the Consent Act has had a big impact on this.
According to Danner’s executive director Yde, the law changes are not without loopholes. He advocates for more shelters and different services for all genders, because the people who need help and the needs of help are different.
The police have enough resources – as long as the incidents are reported
Betina’s last remaining boyfriend seemed like a dream partner in the beginning. He treated his girlfriend well and spoke well of her.
At some point, quite unexpectedly, however, drugs entered the picture, which made the boyfriend’s behavior aggressive, jealous and controlling. Around the same time, Betina started taking sleeping pills, and her boyfriend also pressured Betina to try other, stronger drugs.
Childhood friend Susi Lerche says that the friends often talked about it, and she tried to support Betina as best she could.
– He also contacted the police, but nothing happened to prevent it.
Criminal analyst Kristian Löwenstein The police of North Zealand is familiar with cases of intimate partner violence, but emphasizes that he only reports on the experience gained in his own area of responsibility. According to Løwenstein, the police have the necessary tools to deal with violence.
– We are good at monitoring and tracking domestic violence cases whenever they are reported.
Why then, for example, Susi Leche’s friend didn’t get the necessary help despite many contacts?
– Unfortunately, it is difficult to comment on the case in question, but the police do have the resources to intervene in cases of violence. Of course, we need to know how to prioritize and move cases forward effectively, Løwenstein answers.
He appeals to victims, victims’ relatives or neighbors to always tell the police about incidents, whether it is psychological or physical violence or even suspicion of violence experienced by a loved one.
“Don’t say that it will change, because it won’t”
Crime analyst Kristian Løwenstein says that the criminalization of psychological violence in 2019 and the development of risk assessment in Denmark have promoted the intervention of intimate partner violence.
Denmark also looks at the activities of Finnish and other Nordic authorities.
– In Finland, for example, the authorities and crisis centers cooperate well, and roads use certain risk assessment models that we can learn from, Kristian Løwenstein says.
The story of Susi Lerche’s late friend has also influenced Lerche himself.
When in her previous relationship her boyfriend started commenting on her clothes or limiting her contact with her friends, she pressured him to see a psychologist and psychiatrist. However, nothing helped, and finally Lerche forced himself to leave the relationship.
In his opinion, the Danish police should deal with intimate partner violence much better and the country should have more shelters. It is not enough that mental and physical help and places of escape can only be found in the country’s largest cities.
And what would Lerche like to say to those who fear for their own safety or that of their loved ones?
– If you see that your spouse’s behavior suddenly starts to change, if he becomes morbidly jealous, he starts commenting and controlling his spouse’s clothing – leave.
– Don’t say that he will calm down, that his behavior will change again, because no, it won’t.
What methods do you think could be used to prevent intimate partner violence most effectively? You can discuss the topic on 9.3. until 23:00.