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Reading 2 min.
in collaboration with
Amélie Boukhobza (Clinical psychologist)
While you are looking forward to celebrating this wedding surrounded by your loved ones, the ax has fallen: you must exclude them from the festivities. Decryption of a new phenomenon.
This Saturday, your cousin did it again. “Did you bring your youngest back yet?“, she told you, in an accusatory tone. A “problematic” presence for some, in these new marriages where children are… no longer welcome. How can we explain this new trend? Amélie Boukhboza, psychologist, deciphers this phenomenon.
Excluding children from the festivities, an accepted choice
It’s a fact: more and more couples are choosing to exclude children from their ceremony and reception. A decision, which has become very frequent, and which is clearly stated. On the invitation cards, we can read the words “children not invited” Or “uninvited children“.
At a time when the new generation does everything with their children (“Do it with kids”) – and no longer stops themselves from traveling or going out to restaurants with their children – how can we explain this form of regression? Marriage would be Is there a space exclusively dedicated to adults?
For Amélie Boukhboza, several possible explanations are possible.
“Maybe it’s a question of budget and logistics. It’s true that a wedding is expensive and each guest represents an additional expense. So by excluding children, couples can reduce the total number of guests and tighten the budget. Especially since the presence of children may require specific arrangements: high chairs, adapted menus, entertainment or even nannies. Suddenly everything is simplified!“, she says.
Another plausible avenue: “Perhaps it is the desire to separate the family atmosphere from a more adult atmosphere. Crying, shouting and games disrupt the atmosphere. Without children, everyone will be more festive and relaxed. To have !“, she continues.
“Perhaps also some guests themselves prefer to attend a wedding without their children. To fully enjoy the event without having to worry about monitoring and keeping their little ones busy, and therefore being less responsible… without children, the party is crazier!“, specifies Amélie Boukhboza.
Finally, perhaps it is a reflection of changing social norms and expectations.
“Weddings are becoming more and more personalized, and couples no longer hesitate to impose their own rules so that their day reflects them. After the imposed dress codes, it’s the exclusion of children! What’s the next step ?“, asks the psychologist in conclusion.
Good in his body, good in his head!
What is the right attitude to adopt?
Although the wishes of the bride and groom should be respected, coming to a wedding with or without children remains a deeply personal decision. Each couple must define what is best for them, for their children, based on the circumstances and their desires.
If the idea of entrusting your 3-month-old baby to a third party to satisfy the bride and groom is a source of anxiety, listen to yourself. It is crucial to consider your feelings and emotional well-being.
Slide: How to keep the children busy at a wedding?