Social networks are full of traps and scams of all kinds. A process that is difficult to identify has gained momentum in recent years…
You have certainly encountered it at least once on social networks, without realizing its toxic nature. A loved one or a complete stranger tells you about their misfortunes, with tears in their eyes or even with sobs in their voice, often in front of the camera. This story will touch you deep within yourself. Sometimes, it will make you aware of a reality, but very often, this practice is full of ulterior motives which can go as far as trying to extract money from you.
Some people regularly share publications that pull on the emotional strings by opening up about their daily lives, their journey, their disappointments, their indignations or their dramas. Others have made a specialty of quotes and life lessons. If you find yourself faced with this type of publication and you tend to take things personally, be careful: you risk getting involved beyond reason.
How to detect?
This trend already has a name in the United States: “sadfishing”. In an article in the Journal of American College Health, researchers defined it as “a tendency of social media users to post exaggerations about their emotional state to generate sympathy.” In other words, capturing attention or “fishing” for reactions by portraying one’s feelings, often the saddest ones.
Sadfishing can be unconscious on the part of those who practice it, evoking emotions being part of our nature. But there is also a large part of calculation in what we find on the networks. The ploy was clearly identified in the American media a few years ago, with a very specific case: the influencer Kendall Jenner, known throughout the world, had posted a series of poignant testimonies about her skin problems, devastating in her daily. Fans later realized that these posts hid a partnership with a skincare brand…
Other cases have since come to light in number and not only on Web stars looking for “likes”. Outright scams are spreading, such as “feeling fraud”, listed on the site “The keys to the Bank” (service of the French Banking Federation). In short, you are contacted by a person in serious difficulty who asks you for financial help or offers to be paid in exchange for a service. If the process is often very rude, you can easily be trapped by more subtle methods. Sometimes, the fake profile will take the time to phish you for several weeks of innocuous exchanges, before taking action.
How to react ?
According to Cara Petrofes, a specialist in social media behavior, sadfishing has spread significantly in recent years with worrying effects. According to her, the phenomenon promotes anxiety already exacerbated by this type of media. Anxiety that can affect your mental health or cause you to overcommit yourself, personally or financially. So how to react?
- If a loved one gives in to temptation, it is advisable to contact them directly, without reacting on social networks. Don’t talk to him about his post, but call him to get news. If this person needs connection, then offer them genuine proof of friendship.
- If it’s just an acquaintance, you can post a few words of encouragement, recommend a solution you’ve tried or a book you like. A like or encouraging comment will give the authors of these posts a quick dose of dopamine. But don’t do more.
- If it’s a complete stranger, then that’s up to you. You can obviously do nothing or send a few kind words. But in any case, move on quickly and don’t linger on this conversation, for your morale or your wallet.
Reaching out, without accusing someone of giving in to sadfishing, will always be a good thing. But it’s better to be warned and avoid letting someone’s distress (real or not) lead you into a negative spiral.