Published on
Updated
Reading 3 min.
in collaboration with
Johanna Rozenblum (clinical psychologist)
Among the many ways to be in a relationship, one of them focuses on putting professional opportunities and relationships at the very heart of the relationship. A “benefi-date” which has its advantages and its limits. We’ll explain it to you.
Living on love and fresh water is not for everyone. Some people, on the contrary, think about the professional and personal opportunities that a romantic relationship can bring. And why not ?
What is the “Benefi-date”?
Between the search for profits and that of finding a partner, the “benefit date” is an emerging concept in the world of modern dating. It is a relationship built not only on the emotional bond between two people, but also on the capacities, resources and socio-professional level of the partners. Everyone thus sees in the other an opportunity to increase their professional networking, access to new experiences, or new resources.
For Emma Hathorn, dating expert for Seeking.com, this benefit reflects an evolution in dating, influenced by factors such as the rise of social media, an emphasis on efficiency and productivity, and a shift in relational values of younger generations. In short, much less romantic encounters than before, but more conceptualized.
What are the advantages of Benefi-Date?
Still according to seeking.com, the search for a benefi-date can bring several boosts to one’s life.
- Professional development and networking: The “benefi-date” allows you to meet people from various professional backgrounds and can open doors and encourage fruitful collaborations;
- Learning and personal enrichment: These meetings allow you to acquire new skills and knowledge, contributing to personal enrichment;
- Efficiency and pragmatism: In a world where time is precious, the “benefi-date” allows you to combine the search for enriching relationships with the pursuit of personal goals;
- Clarity of expectations: This open approach allows for honest and direct communication from the beginning of the relationship.
- Diversity and discovery: The “benefi-date” encourages meeting people from different backgrounds and offers the opportunity to discover new interests and passions.
“This type of relationship is sometimes criticized for its approach which can appear “self-serving”. However, its followers emphasize that it is a pragmatic way of approaching dating, maximizing the time and effort invested in the search for partners. Moreover, this tendency is not limited to the search for practical or professional benefits, but can be the starting point for a more meaningful emotional connection.” develops Emma Hathorn. According to her, in fact, the foundations and common interests and mutual discovery can undoubtedly be transformed into authentic love, over time.
Rules for healthy management of this profitable relationship
Let’s not be naive: if this convergence of interests can lead to a lasting and solid love, the benefi-date can also deviate towards a toxic and utilitarian relationship. It is therefore essential to remain honest about your desires, intentions and your vision of the relationship from the start. And to ensure three main principles:
- Maintain the balance of the relationship, knowing how to appreciate the personal and unique qualities of the individual;
- Ensure that all interactions are based on honesty, mutual respect and consent, avoiding any form of exploitation;
- Encourage open and honest communication to ensure all parties are comfortable and in agreement with the nature of the relationship.
Thus, no one takes advantage of anyone or rather, everyone takes advantage of the other knowingly.
“The couple has become a means of rising socially”
What do you think of these benefit dates? For Johanna Rozenblum, psychologist and member of our expert committee, it is not our responsibility to say whether this is good or not, as long as the relationship suits both people. On the other hand, this new relationship indicates an evolution in the couple
“What we can see through this benefi-date is that the couple is now no longer just the place of emotional personal fulfillment, but an encounter that can mutually bring social and professional benefits and privileges . This says something about the objectives that people have today: meeting is used to exist socially more than to flourish emotionally. It also says something about how we view what it means to succeed in life. Is it finding your soul mate with whom to share your life? Or a person who can bring us (and vice versa) privileges, who can help us climb the social ladder?”
It’s up to you to see what matters.
Slide: 10 signs that your relationship is balanced