Before you make your relationship official, here are three crucial boundaries to set with your partner!

Have you met someone you get along with and everything is going well? Before making your relationship official to those around you and starting a serious relationship, it would be better to ask yourself a few questions and discuss them with your partner. Indeed, love is not always enough to maintain a healthy relationship. Discussions about your desires, your plans and your needs are necessary for your personal well-being. Mark Travers, an American psychologist who graduated from Cornell University and the University of Colorado, is therefore featured in the magazine Forbes, three discussions to have with your partner before committing. Doctissimo presents them to you!

Know your expectations for the future

While talking about the future and making plans early on in a relationship can be scary, knowing what your partner wants for the future is essential to understanding it better. Having this type of conversation as early as possible could save you from a big heartache!

According to the psychologist, to build a serious relationship, it is first imperative to have long-term goals and common life plans. Otherwise, your relationship could be put to the test. Compromising on what is important to you, such as marriage, having children, or living elsewhere, can lead you to a future that will not fully satisfy you. A word of advice: make your priorities non-negotiable!

In this regard, some studies confirm the importance of discussing your future expectations. One of them, published in 2017 in the “Journal of Experimental Psychology: General”, revealed that satisfaction in romantic relationships is influenced not only by current fulfillment but also by indicators of future satisfaction. For example, the events one plans with one’s partner, the hope that the relationship will grow day by day, as well as the differences that partners have in this regard.

Without this clarity, you risk investing time and energy into a relationship that may not meet your needs in the long term. By setting expectations from the beginning, you commit to working together toward a fulfilling future for both of you.

Talking about your sexual desires and preferences

In a relationship, sex is one of the ways of expressing love, which can take a small or very large place from one individual to another. As a result, each person has their own desires and needs, both in terms of quality and quantity. To ensure the fulfillment of your relationship, it is essential to talk about your desires but also your limits in the area of ​​sexuality. Moreover, a study published in the “Journal of Family Psychology” in 2016 highlights this point. The results showed that feeling satisfied in your relationship early on does not necessarily guarantee sexual satisfaction later on. On the other hand, feeling sexually satisfied from the start could improve the overall fulfillment of the relationship.

For those who are intimidated by the idea of ​​approaching the subject, remember that without discussing your sexual desires, your partner will never be able to meet these expectations, nor confide in you about theirs. In addition, a fulfilling sex life requires above all good communication. So it would be a shame to deprive yourself of it!

Discuss your families involvement in your daily life

When you start a serious romantic relationship, you have to take into account that it cannot exist independently of your friendships or family relationships. It is therefore necessary to establish boundaries with your partner regarding these other relationships, in order to avoid them spilling over into your relationship. Here again, everyone has a different vision! Some are close to their family and want to see them every week, sharing their life in the smallest details, while others are content with one visit per year without any real sharing. When you start a serious relationship, it is essential to define to what extent you want your family and that of your partner to be involved in your daily life. This will help you avoid finding yourself in situations that could make you feel uncomfortable, or making unjustified reproaches to your partner.

According to psychologists, for this to work, both partners must agree on certain points, such as the frequency of family visits or the degree of information shared with them.

Slideshow: 8 questions to ask your partner (and yourself) for a lasting relationship