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We are beginning to understand the contours of narcissistic people. But are they the type to break up a household for fun or ego? A study revealed by Psychology Today asked the question. The answer is not so simple.
The concept of forbidden (and therefore more attractive) fruit is common in the world of romantic relationships. It includes an attraction to someone else’s spouse or partner…and the problems that come with it. But are narcissists more accustomed to, or even driven by, stealing someone’s partner? A study asked the question, and it’s now updated by the magazine Psychology Today.
A charming personality, but marked by arrogance
In this study, Amy B. Brunell, the lead author, has deciphered what makes a so-called grandiose (strongly pronounced) narcissistic personality. This is described as marked by arrogance, selfishness, an exaggerated view of oneself and a great deal of extraversion. In short, grandiose narcissists see themselves as unique, special and a priority. This is perhaps why they take advantage of others, feel less guilty and experience reduced levels of moral reasoning. However, they are also socially competent and above all very charming, which allows them to achieve their goals.
More frequent short-term relationships
Regarding the type of relationship these narcissists envision, the study found that they are also more likely to approve of casual, non-committal sex, have more sexual partners, and therefore prefer short-term relationships. They also note that their need for influence can encourage sexual behaviors such as sexual coercion toward women and sexual aggression among men. In this context, and feeling “sexier” than others, these narcissists tend to gravitate toward many different “targets.”
Feeling good in your body, feeling good in your head!
Married or not, who is their favorite target?
But is this often problematic seducer personality more motivated by the lure of someone who is already “taken”? Against all odds, the study reveals that it is not. More precisely, narcissists are only interested in their own relational gain. They are therefore not “more” interested in a person in a relationship than a single person. What motivates them is more to obtain the favors of the person who interests them the most, but not at all their status.
To conclude, the researchers therefore mention an unstoppable technique to protect against these predators: “Given the undesirable traits that narcissists bring to a relationship, best practice is to avoid people who are looking for a short-term, non-committal romantic relationship.”
Slideshow: Narcissistic pervert: 10 signs that should alert you