Andriana Susak couldn’t wait any longer. He knows it will get easier soon.
– A little longer this time, right? And a little stronger too, Susak jokes to the doctor with a grin on his face.
Doctor Serhiy Kalynych answers annoyed:
– You speak as if I were putting something suspicious in the mix. Lay down!
Susak, 35, is a Ukrainian soldier and the mother of a small boy. The doctor places a gas mask over Susaki’s face, and he begins inhaling a gas called xenon. The machine starts whirring, and soon Susak falls asleep.
Susak and his doctor give permission to film the situation.
Xenon is a rare, heavy noble gas that, for example, Russian athletes have used to improve recovery and sleep quality.
After twenty minutes of sleep, Susak is awake again. He says he “won the jackpot” when he received treatment at this private clinic. He participates in an experiment that investigates how gas affects war trauma and the healing of soldiers.
But what happened to Susaki, and why did he go to war and expose himself to injury in the first place?
According to various estimates, up to 60,000 women are fighting in the ranks of the Ukrainian army. There have been no call-ups for women, unlike men, but women have joined the forces as volunteers.
The number of female soldiers seems a lot, but compared to male soldiers, the number is still very small.
Susak’s story began ten years ago. He lived a quiet life in Kyiv, studied linguistics and worked in marketing.
Then began the national awakening of Ukraine, which led to the Maidan revolution in 2013. The demonstration was followed by the occupation of Crimea and the Russian invasion of eastern Ukraine.
Susak quit his job and joined the battalion, which was assembled from people who participated in the demonstrations.
Susak was in many frontline battles.
While at the front, Susak became pregnant. The guns remained, and as a mother of a small baby, Susak became a civil activist.
She founded an organization called Veteranka, whose goal is to improve the position of women in the army.
When Russia attacked Ukraine with all its might in 2022, Susak took up arms again.
Susak’s son was six years old at the time. The boy is now growing up in the care of others, because the father is also at the front.
In December 2022, Susak was on combat duty in the Kherson region. The Russians had been evicted from this area before. That’s when the fatal car ride happened.
– We drove a familiar road. It was very slippery. We didn’t notice that there were still mines there. We drifted out, and I drove over an anti-tank mine.
Susak was seriously injured. He suffered numerous serious fractures such as a fractured skull and a fractured spine. The impact also caused nerve damage.
However, he feels lucky.
– I have combat comrades who have lost their limbs due to such mines, but I still have arms and legs.
The Russian media reported on the event and declared that “the Ukrainian Nazi had been eliminated”. A Russian story by Susak had lost his limbs in the explosion.
The position of women has changed over ten years
The fact that women are fighting in the Ukrainian army is not unusual in terms of military history. In the Second World War, thousands if not hundreds of thousands of women fought, for example, in the Red Army of the Soviet Union. Also in the Finnish Civil War in 1918, about two thousand women fought in the Reds.
The war that started almost ten years ago has changed the position of women in the Ukrainian army. According to the law, women have only been allowed to participate in combat missions since 2018. However, they were already soldiers before.
Susak says that the law produced difficulties. A woman’s surrender in battle was not recorded as a war injury. Therefore, women injured in combat duties were not treated in military hospitals either.
Susak recalls an event ten years ago.
– I was in the stormtroopers liberating cities in 2014, but I was registered as a seamstress. I received a state medal. We laughed at the fact that the mark was made by a seamstress.
Now every tenth woman serving in the Ukrainian army serves in combat missions.
Susak cannot reveal what exactly his mission is. That’s what he says, that he knows how to handle weapons.
– I use the American Stinger or, for example, the K19 grenade launcher. I work with the weapons my commander tells me to use.
Susak says that the attitude towards women in the army has changed. For example, the national “Defender of Ukraine Day” is now named after both male and female soldiers. And war reporting now elevates both female and male soldiers as heroes.
However, according to Susak, improving the position of women in the Ukrainian army is still in progress. In 2021, there was an uproar when Ukraine celebrated 30 years of independence, and women were made to walk in high heels in a military parade. Women’s uniforms also started to be produced only a couple of months ago. Before that, women had to wear men’s models.
Susak fights for his son
Susak’s son is now seven years old.
– He hasn’t seen his mother or father for over a year. He understands that we are in the army. He is of course sad, says Susak.
He calls his child every day.
When we talk, he reminisces about the times when we were still a family. He wishes we were all together again. I tell her to stay strong.
When the boy was four years old, he told his mother that he wanted to be a superhero with an umbrella that covered the whole sky. It’s hard for Sus too to contain his emotions when telling his memory.
– He said that we would be sheltered under the shade and drink tea in peace when Russia launched its nuclear weapons.
Now the boy is building Lego tanks with cannons in every direction.
Susak’s solution seems hard. On the other hand, is it harder than any father of a small child going to war?
Susak acknowledges it like this:
– War has no gender. Those who have the resources go to war.
Susak says that the boy is the only person in the world who can influence his decisions. The boy had asked him to visit the school so that he could introduce his mother to his classmates and prove that he had a mother.
Susak also says that he is fighting specifically for his child. And he doesn’t think he even chose the situation. Russia left no options.
– Fifty percent of the population are women. Who can stop us from defending our country? Who can stop me from protecting my son from Russian missiles and bombs? Susak says.
However, Susak’s heart is broken. It is hard for him to accept what Russia has done to his family.
– It hurts me a lot that the Russians took away not only my right to a happy life, but also my son’s childhood.
Susak wants to return to the front as soon as possible. That’s exactly why he’s here, breathing xenon gas.
– I need this procedure so that I can return to the service with my brothers and sisters.