The 13-year-old boy does not speak or look towards. The boy has left Kiev to see a man shot in the head on the street and has not spoken since.
The woman has been on an escape trip for two nights outdoors with her 7-year-old daughter and 8-month-old baby. As the frost fell, he slept with his baby in his small suitcase.
The other mother didn’t even have a suitcase. The woman saw how this baby no longer woke up in the morning.
Refugees from Ukraine to Poland now have such experiences, says the Polish Dominik35, Ylelle via video call.
He has been on duty at the Ukrainian-Polish border for two weeks and has taken people fleeing the war to safety. Many have no idea where they could sleep the next night or where to get a meal.
Dominik says the refugees are still scared when they get in the helper’s car.
– For example, many do not dare to take water or a sandwich from me or the border volunteers. People only relax a little after an hour or two drive, Dominik says.
In the first days of the war, in late February, those who had ready contacts in Europe fled. Now, people are getting worse and worse across the border. They have suffered for weeks from cold, hunger and constant fear.
Dominik is the first person to whom dozens of refugees have shared their experiences in the midst of war.
He appears in this story with his first name alone because he does not want to jeopardize his helping work. He also wants to protect the people he transports. Dominik’s full name is known to .
The 73-year-old wandered the border without a passport or snack
Dominik is, in his own words, “just an ordinary electrician.” He is from eastern Poland but works in Germany.
From there, he drove straight to the Polish-Ukrainian border on February 27, three days after the war broke out.
– My good friend left the border by car first. He was already there the same day the attack began. Early Sunday morning he called and said, ‘there is chaos here, there is a huge need for help here’.
Dominik called his German boss and explained that he needed unpaid leave to help the refugees. After pondering for a moment, the boss agreed.
Over the next few days, Dominik and his friends organized into a circle of about 20 men fetching refugees from various border crossings and taking them inland to Poland – wherever where accommodation can be found. Another network of volunteers will help you find them.
Dominik says he found a 73-year-old woman wandering near the border a few days ago. He only carried the clothes he was wearing, no money and no passport.
– He said he was from Kiev, but did not want to tell how he had managed to get to Poland. He just said I woke up, looked out the window and thought I needed to get to Poland, Dominik says.
A conversation between a mother and a four-year-old child in the back seat of a car has also come to mind.
– I heard a child after a long silence ask his mother if war would come here too. Mom replied that there would be no, we are safe now. The child began to cry.
It was a difficult place for Dominic. He himself has a son of the same age.
One third of Ukrainian refugees may suffer serious trauma
Assistant Professor of Psychiatry, who studied traumas caused by refugees Arash Javanbakht considers the reactions described by Dominik to be quite typical: fear and anxiety do not end when one gets to safety.
“Refugees may experience explosions over and over again, see nightmares, have panic attacks, or suffer from depression,” Javanbakht, who teaches at Wayne State University in the United States, says in a video interview with .
He estimates that a third or more of Ukraine’s refugees may be severely traumatized.
They can cause speechlessness or regression. A seven-year-old can return to the level of a toddler. It may also be impossible for a child to be separated from their parent at all.
– There are children in Kiev who do not agree to leave the metro tunnel. It’s the only place they consider safe, Javanbakht says.
The same is said by the Executive Director of Finnish Refugee Aid Annu Lehtinen.
He emphasizes that now the fugitives are in many different situations from those who were able to leave as soon as the attack began. Many who first crossed the border had their own car, luggage and a place to go.
– Now there are more elderly people, people with disabilities, small children and the sick in Poland who have found it more difficult to get moving, Lehtinen says.
According to him, it would be extremely important to be able to identify and register those in need of urgent support right at the Ukrainian border.
It is crucial for recovery that children, and especially parents, receive support as soon as they arrive in the new country, says Arash Javanbakht.
According to him, a friendly car driver is already a big help, even if he does not replace a professional driver. A fearful child can be provided with a blanket or additional heating – anything that can make them feel safe.
“Helping is not miraculous but normal”
On Monday of this week, Dominik returned to work in Germany. Before that, he also took a weekend off, “so that his head would survive a little.” The wallet also requires a return to work. For the Opel fuel borrowed from the state, I have already had to ask friends for money.
In addition, Dominik’s own son has been in full care of his mother in recent weeks.
– My idea is that I could do two weeks of work and then drive every third week, but I haven’t asked yet if this would suit the boss, Dominik reveals.
He also thinks that the next trips might be worth making from Poland to the German side, where finding accommodation for refugees could be easier.
– Everyone says that what I’m doing is somehow wonderful, Dominik says in a slightly bored tone.
– It’s no wonder, it’s normal to help. It’s a bit like seeing your toddler fall, you can help him up. It’s not hard.
Poland will not survive on helping refugees in poor condition alone
Sometimes accommodation for a newcomer can only be found on the other side of the country.
For example, the drive from the Uhryniv border crossing to Warsaw or Krakow takes 4-5 hours. It is already eight hours to drive to the northern city of Gdansk.
– The central part of Poland is already ** full. At first, there was enough bed for everyone, but now it may be that the network will only find one bed for three people, Dominik says.
In western Poland, the situation is almost as difficult, he said. There is better space in the eastern part of the country, and there is still room in the north.
Annu Lehtinen, a refugee, also estimates that Poland’s borders are beginning to be met.
According to him, Poland’s problems in receiving refugees are only beginning to show now that newcomers have more special needs and fewer contacts than those who had previously fled Ukraine.
– Poland has little experience in receiving refugees, especially from war zones, he says.
According to Lehtinen, Poland will soon need help from other states: for example, experts to provide trauma support and trace separated family members. Similarly, Poland needs support in accommodation arrangements.
– Now many Poles are accommodating Ukrainians at home, but this will not continue. Few are able to accommodate very traumatized people for a very long time, Lehtinen points out.
Dominik hopes that the refugees from Poland will be able to get to the rest of Europe as well.
– Everyone knows that if there are too many people in one place, they will start fighting. Poland is not a strong country, we will not survive on this alone, Dominik says.
At least one of the stories he tells seems to have a happy ending after all.
Dominik’s friends managed to get in touch with the 73-year-old son of a stray woman living in Canada. This had tried to reach his mother from Kiev without success.
Now it seems that the woman will be able to fly to her son within a couple of weeks.
You can discuss the topic until Tuesday 23.3. until 11 p.m.
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