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Amélie Boukhobza (Clinical psychologist)
When everything is going well in a relationship, we know it. But conversely, when things get tense, it can be difficult to sort things out. How do you know your story is finished? Here are three little-known signs, analyzed by Amélie Boukhobza, psychologist.
When you have been in a relationship for a long time and no longer find much interest in your partner, you may wonder if you stay with your partner out of simple habit. If this is the case, you have to ask yourself the right questions and see if the relationship still has a future. For this, Suzanne Degges-White, couples therapist, reveals in Business Insider three signs, quite little known, but which do not deceive.
You delay going home in the evening
Have you finished working but stay at the office, chatting with your colleagues instead of going home? This can show that your relationship is not in good shape. “IIt is clear that delaying the return home is a bad sign in the relationship. Even more so if you experience anxiety or fear of your partner’s reaction. But a bad sign of what? A one-off conflict? Bad compatibility? Or something else? We will have to clarify the reasons” notes Amélie Boukhobza.
You don’t need or want to write to your spouse
The day can seem long, when you really love someone and while waiting to find him or her, sending text messages can be a solution to wait. But if this is not the case, ask yourself the right questions. “Avoiding or refusing to respond to your partner’s texts is also a bad sign! It could be distance or disinterest. Communication in a healthy couple should normally be fluid and reciprocal. So not wanting to respond can indicate disengagement or disinvestment in the relationship.” explains the psychologist again.
You are negative about the future of your relationship
A couple who loves each other is generally teeming with plans, whether it be future children, the next vacation or simply the future outing together. If not, ask yourself. “The absence of positivity about the future of the relationship is the mark of deep dissatisfaction. Normally if all goes well, we want to build, share and move forward together.” confirms our expert.
If you notice these signs in your relationship, it may be time to end it or think about what it can become. According to Amélie Boukhobza, there are different options. “You can decide to address these problems directly with your partner to try to understand together what is happening and perhaps find solutions. she says first of all.
“You can also consider getting help from a couples therapist to allow us to discuss and resolve conflicts in a neutral space or try to rekindle the flame by setting up new couple routines or activities“Finally, if the couple is really over, the relationship must end.”We can also tell ourselves that things are no longer going well, take time for ourselves and our reflection and trust what we feel to decide together on the best outcome of the relationship, including if it is to end it. !” she concludes.
Slide: 10 signs that your relationship is balanced