Wedding, happy event, blow … At the workplace, everything ends one day or another by knowing. The birthday cake concocted in great secrecy by the team when you expect the least, the wise advice of those who have already experienced white nights with a newborn baby, or even the miracle remedy when you guess stress in the personal life of a colleague. Good camaraderie, kindness, discussions around a coffee to entrust his doubts to an attentive ear. “Privacy has taken up more and more room for work since the COVVI-19,” notes Anna Milleret-Godet, associate lawyer at Delsol Avocats. With online meetings, work has entered the personal sphere. The children’s cries, the favorite mug, the not so stealthy shadow of the spouse, the living room in the background … The videoconferences have indeed lifted the veil on a part of our intimacy, and since then, social networks have further accentuated the phenomenon. But how far is it advisable to confide in the office on your private life, without fear that one day “all that you will say can be retained against you”?
“During the recruitment process, it is prohibited to ask a candidate for details such as his marital status, a union activity, or even an ethnic or religious affiliation. These are all elements that come from the strict private domain, as soon as they have no connection with the position concerned. Some professions, on the other hand, require that certain private facts be provided, as the presentation of a criminal record to exercise as a trader, Milleret-goide.
Once hired, the employee is required to provide certain essential information, such as a valid address, and any change of address in the event of a move. Nothing more. However, no obligation to share details on his family situation, whether with his colleagues or human resources. But choosing to stay discreet is also to take the risk of missing out certain advantages offered by the company, such as a birth premium, holidays for sick children, or a vacation adapted to the school rate.
In the event of economic dismissal, the family situation – such as the number of dependent children – comes into account in the criteria of dismissal. Without this information, an employee can be found with fewer points than his colleague and thus become a priority for a departure. “In the execution of the employment contract, France is diametrically opposite what is done in the United States,” said Anna Milleret-Godet. “Thus, an American group had sent to all of its subsidiaries, including French, a satisfaction questionnaire with all employees, in particular on their sexual orientations and their religion, with an objective of inclusion. In France, this type of question is prohibited, and can even shock despite the displayed intention of improving the daily life of employees”.
Likewise, the employer’s management power cannot be based on facts relating to the employee’s privacy, except in the event of a breach of the obligation of loyalty or when personal behavior causes an objective disorder within the company. However, a criticism formulated by an employee about his company, published in a limited circle as a Facebook group closed or via private messaging, cannot be criticized for a judge.
Romantic relationships in the company
According to the Better Chasseurs recruitment platform (February 2025), 39 % of French people recognize having experienced a romantic relationship at their workplace. And according to a study conducted by IFOP in 2018, 14 % of couples have even been trained in the office. “The French Labor Code absolutely does not prohibit romantic relationships within the company”, confirms the lawyer Anna Milleret-Godet. However, in A recent casethe Court of Cassation considered that a HRD who had had a hidden relationship with a union representative, had failed in his obligation of loyalty. “The idea is not to prohibit intimate relations between employees, but to prevent situations which could generate harassment, conflicts of interest, discrimination”, specifies the expert.
Apart from these delicate situations, and if discretion remains possible, the expert recommends cutting rumors and preventing his hierarchy in order, for example, to be able to take a vacation at the same time. This also allows the manager, if there should be a separation, to understand that an employee crosses a difficult test. A recommendation may be unnecessary for the 68 % of French people (79 % of men against 56 % of women) who think that it is no longer possible to fall in love at work … but to meditate for the 52 % of women who declare that they have already felt a “crush” during an interview, as well as for their managers (betterchases).
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