Many parents are mistaken in thinking. They adopt an attitude that is actually harmful to children.
Finding the right way to educate your children is a challenge for all parents. If everyone has their own formula, certain methods may prove harmful to children. However, they are used by many parents who sometimes do not realize their negative impact. This is the case of “tiger parents”, a term introduced by the author Amy Chua to designate those who are inspired by a Chinese education method, putting in the foreground the academic success of children.
It thus advocates discipline, work and excellence. These parents are often demanding, authoritarian and very strict. The child is then subject to significant pressure and faces a busy schedule, punctuated by educational activities and additional courses. Conversely, leisure is little present in his daily life. Elena Goutard, parental coach, specifies on the site Aufeminine That the child’s capacities are often “overestimated” and that it is “treated as an adult”.
This method is not without risk to the child, as Gérard Neyrand, professor of family sociology, explains, at Ouest-Francebecause “the child can feel a lot of stress and an important emotional charge”. This can start a lack of self -confidence and anxiety. He can also find himself afraid of his parents.
A study published in Development and Psychology In particular attests that the severity of parents would have an impact on the brain of children. If it is important to stimulate a child and think of his future, going so far poses a real problem. Growing up, he could rebel and conflict.
Why do “tiger parents” have this behavior? At this stage, “it is not a question of love for him but for himself. Risk when you instrumentalize your child as a trophy for self -valuation is to lose the love it needs for the way for grow, “says Caroline Goldman, doctor of psychopathology, with Ouest-France.
These parents can then tend to focus only on the success of the child rather than on his well-being. Children, for their part, become programmed robots to satisfy their parents’ aspirations. For this, they can become ready for anything, even to lie or cheat.
Parents with a high level of diploma are those who use this method the most, wishing to offer their child the same luck. However, they do not realize that this can be harmful. Gérard Neyrand then advises “Leave a moment of respite to the child” and Caroline Goldman “to think rather of giving evidence of love”. Parents must also not project their personal ambitions on their children and rather make them themselves.