Published on
Updated
Reading 2 min.
The relationship a child has with their mother is a unique bond in the world. Unfortunately, some people are toxic to their own children. How can you learn to recognize the behaviors of a toxic mother? Here are eight of them.
The bond between a mother and her child is so precious that we don’t imagine that it could be toxic. However, in some families, mothers represent real poisons for their child(ren). How to recognize them? Here are eight typical behaviors.
She is jealous and tries to compete with you
A mother should want the best for her child and there is no reason for her to want to compete with him (or her). However, toxic mothers are like that. If you tell her about a promotion at work or any other good news, she will remind you of how successful she was when she was younger, instead of congratulating you.
She compares you, between brothers and sisters
In a sibling group, the children’s personalities are generally different. And this can interfere with the relationship that one has with one’s mother, in particular. A toxic mother will take a malicious pleasure in comparing you, between brothers and sisters. This is generally accompanied by acerbic remarks, which resemble disguised attacks. On your spouse, your work or any other subject that she deems appropriate to criticize.
She refuses to respect your boundaries
Even though you have asked her several times not to do it anymore, your mother continues to come to your house unannounced. And even though the limits are set, she refuses to comply with them. This is a clear sign of toxicity.
You feel exhausted every time you are together
Every time you interact with your mother, do you feel exhausted? This is a sign that she is toxic. And this observation is true for all toxic people in your personal or professional circle.
She plays the victim
Sometimes parents blame their children, especially when they don’t comply with their requests. However, there is a difference between expressing disappointment and criticizing the other person for refusing. For example, if your mother no longer speaks to you because you refused to spend the holiday season with her, that is toxic behavior.
She gives ultimatums
Is your mother in the habit of giving you ultimatums, threatening to no longer recognize you as her child? This type of threat is a “red flag” that should alert you: this is major toxic behavior. Remember that a parent’s love for their child must be unconditional.
She is manipulative
A toxic mother is usually manipulative too. This kind of person gets others to do what she wants. To do this, she may ask questions, but they will not be without ulterior motives. She actually wants to know more about you, to achieve her own goals.
Feeling good in your body, feeling good in your head!
She helps you, but expects something else in return
A toxic mother will help out, but will constantly remind you that she has helped out and expect another favor in return. If your mother demands that you paint her living room in return for picking up your kids from school, be wary. You should be able to ask her for help, without her immediately demanding something else in return.
Slide: 6 Types of Phrases Used by Toxic People