Sunday, July 7, the evening of the second round. The results are trickling in; this elected member from the various right is assured of regaining her seat at the Palais Bourbon. Her smartphone keeps vibrating – traditional congratulatory messages – when Yaël Braun-Pivet’s number appears on the screen. “Congratulations on your re-election! It’s up to us to build a great republican coalition that will meet the expectations of the French and ensure that our Assembly functions as well as possible. For that, we will need each and every one of us, you can count on me. I kiss you.”
The recipient raises an eyebrow. This sudden closeness displayed by the outgoing president of the National Assembly, when she only knows her vaguely, does not share the same label and has even (very) often opposed the government’s policy in the previous legislature… “A bit cryptic this SMS, all the same”, she sneers. Not fooled for a penny! “She is playing her re-election to the perch and trying to rally at Renaissance, she analyzes. We have all been inundated with texts by Yaël Braun-Pivet.” Message received 5 out of 5.
“200 quaestor positions to be promised”
At the Palais Bourbon, the love season has begun. After the tough battle of the legislative elections, another offensive has been underway since the day after the second round. A hegemonic struggle, where each stable is trying to fill its ranks with new faces, with a view to the constitution of the parliamentary groups, to be declared by July 18 at the latest. Here, love has no time for hierarchies. Deputies, first-time elected and unknown to the general public, then find themselves courted by the cream of the main political parties. Like this independent deputy who, the day after his election, was contacted by Olivier Faure, first secretary of the Socialist Party. “Join us, we have to get ahead of La France Insoumise, to become the pivot of the future enlarged left majority,” he told him. “We are only one seat away, you can stop Trump, global warming and guarantee peace in the world,” caricatures the person concerned in the face of so much consideration. Love, true love, can also last only a week: “Basically, I was made to understand that we had to be the most numerous on the left for July 18, but that after that I could do what I wanted,” he continues. We are disillusioned: could it be a cohabitation of circumstance?
Or simply flirting. “Is this Tinder or what?”, chokes a parliamentarian, a little surprised by the methods used. It must be said that the process is well-oiled. “The groups identify their target, then approach them via the member identified as knowing you personally,” explains the elected official. A congratulatory text message, a phone call or a coffee; an informal conversation in the aisles of the National Assembly. Sometimes a meeting arranged with the pen-head of the parliamentary group. It even happens that the courtiers pull out all the stops. Like this overseas elected official who, during the inter-round period, was invited to Beauvau by Minister Gérald Darmanin himself, to convince her to join him for his return to the Chamber. Or this deputy from central France, greeted with great fanfare at the airport by ministerial advisers with whom he had briefly chatted. “Given the promises they make to each one, one gets the impression that the negotiators have 200 quaestor positions to promise,” jokes one parliamentarian. A game of poker-liar, ultimately.
“Setting conditions… that are unattainable”
How do you handle such requests when you are a newcomer to the Palais Bourbon? The conduct to adopt is a subtle art, according to the breviary of some experienced flock. Rule No. 1: in politics, you never say no! “You can’t close doors in advance,” says one of the courtiers. “We set conditions… that are unattainable,” he smiles. Thus, resolutely anti-LFI deputies classified as miscellaneous left and miscellaneous center have made their attachment to the Socialist Party conditional on a clear break from the pink house with the Mélenchonists. Rule No. 2: watch out for the melon! “If you fall into the ego trap, you’re done for!” warns a deputy from the Liot group. “You’re just a number; the courtiers’ game is to make us believe that we’re not just an addition.”
Rule number 3: have a good memory… It was apparently lacking for this deputy from the Centre Val-de-Loire who, upon his arrival at the Assembly, found himself cornered, at the same time, by the two parliamentary groups with which he had more or less engaged… And above all, rule number 4: have fun! “Nothing better than when they are on the negotiation slide. You have to see how far they can go, it’s great: even Renaissance offered me the freedom to vote,” sneers a diverse right-wing parliamentarian.
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