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Reading 2 min.
in collaboration with
Siyana Mincheva (Psychologist, psychotherapist)
All men in a relationship have been faced with the situation at least once in their life: this delicate moment when their partner asks them a question about their physique. What attitude should you adopt? Should we lie to preserve her or on the contrary be sincere, at the risk of hurting her? The answers of Siyana Mincheva, psychologist.
“Honey, do you think I’ve gained weight? “. There are many men in relationships who hear this question regularly and who are almost always embarrassed to answer it.
Note also that beyond weight, the question can also relate to wrinkles, beauty or physical appearance in general. So many trick questions, the answers to which may at least not satisfy the wife, or even trigger an argument.
Should you be sincere or is it better to lie?
The question of the position to adopt then arises. Should you lie to your partner, assuring her that she remains as fine as when you met? Or on the contrary let her know that she has indeed gained the dreaded pounds? “When a man asks himself this question, it proves that he is not clear with the answer he can give to his wife: perhaps he does not know how to approach the question with her or that he is afraid of hurting her, depending on her answer” says Siyana Mincheva.
Trust in the couple, an essential element
For the psychologist, it is actually a question of trust in the couple. “If both members of the couple accept each other and push each other towards the best by being sincere towards each other, that’s a very good sign”. For the expert, “this shows that they are not embarrassed to hear the other’s opinion and that they will not feel judged”. The important thing is to support each other, whatever the question initially asked.
Set yourself couple challenges
For the example of weight gain, “sometimes, the woman does not realize her extra pounds, accumulated over time and for different reasons. In this case, the spouse can tell her in a caring manner, and offer support to his partner” believes Siyana Mincheva.
The couple can then begin a detox, a dietary rebalancing or set challenges, which are always more motivating to do together. “IIt is also important to be there for each other for reciprocal and effective support. When we support and love each other, it is possible to face difficulties and with a little motivation and discipline, anything can succeed.”
Slide: 10 signs that your relationship is balanced