Adopting this attitude could rekindle the romantic flame

Adopting this attitude could rekindle the romantic flame

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    Want to get closer to your partner? According to an American psychologist, bringing the notion of playing together into everyday life would be an excellent way to rekindle your flame and reconnect.

    In our adult lives, we often associate play with the world of childhood, that period of our lives characterized by freedom, imagination and a few less responsibilities. But according to Nicole K. McNichols, an American psychologist distilling her advice in the journal Psychology Today, it’s wrong! Research shows that the benefits of play not only help children, but also apply to adults.

    Play within the couple, a vector of many benefits

    Playfulness in adult romantic relationships would connect us deeply and meaningfully to our partners. And this in several different ways:

    • Studies show that when couples invite play into their intimate lives, it builds trust, increases intimacy, reduces conflict, and provides a “safe” way to communicate through the production of common sense;
    • Research has also shown that simple, playful everyday interactions, such as calling each other by special nicknames, joking, and even teasing each other, stabilize relationships by facilitating communication and dissipating tension;
    • Gaming has also been shown to be a powerful aphrodisiac! By being playful, adopting unusual accessories and places, couples feel more comfortable experimenting with new types of sexual experiences.

    It seems like play is the perfect antidote to monotony, which can threaten the integrity of any long-term relationship.

    Different ways to live more playfully

    According to the psychologist, the subject is even deeper and nuanced than that. It is important to note that not all types of games generate the same benefits. Most types of play are helpful to a relationship, but some types produce more good than others.

    In a study of 211 heterosexual couples, researchers looked at four different types of play and the impact of each type on the health of the couple’s relationship.

    • The game directed towards the other : it describes playful interactions between partners such as words or actions intended to ease tensions. Giving each other cute nicknames and gently teasing each other would fall into this category;
    • Light play : this second type of play involves adopting a worldview that values ​​improvisation and seeing life more as a playground, rather than something filled with serious tasks;
    • The intellectual game : this third type consists of making clever word games, setting challenges, delighting in the complexity of problems rather than assuming their simplicity;
    • Fantasy : the latter type includes having a preference for unusual people, situations, or objects and feeling comfortable shaping what may seem mundane or strange into a colorful and enjoyable event.

    The authors found that depending on the extent to which couples expressed more or less of these four types of playfulness, their level of relationship satisfaction varied. Overall, these findings suggest that when couples express playfulness in their relationships, they tend to be happier and satisfied. Play diffuses tension, invites novelty, and promotes connection through shared meaning and a feeling of being in agreement.

    Certain types of playfulness, particularly those that are intellectual in nature and other-oriented, are more closely related to overall relationship satisfaction, however, all facets of playfulness are linked to certain relationship benefits.

    So don’t hesitate any longer. Place your bets !

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