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in collaboration with
Johanna Rozenblum (clinical psychologist)
One in 3 French people today live as a “celicouple”. But what is this new romantic attitude, its interests and its limits? We talk about it with Johanna Rozenblum, psychologist.
Each new era, its new notion of couple. A big trend is currently making headlines: that of the celicouple, two people who live their love fully, without sharing the same living space, a concept that seems to work for many.
The celicouple, a habit that grows with age
The concept at the crossroads of singleness and the couple (hence its name) thus combines two schemes: the commitment of a couple, while maintaining their freedom, or in any case, their home. People feel together, but prefer to keep their space private.
A habit of a young couple? Not necessarily. According to’National Institute of Demographic Studies, it is not the young lovebirds who are the most adept at this model. In reality, this is not the case… It is those aged 45-65 who have the least desire to settle down with their partner, at 22%. While 68% of 26-30 year olds want to start a household.
Why choose the celicouple?
For Johanna Rozenblum, clinical psychologist member of our committee of experts, there is undoubtedly more than one reason to want to try this love scheme, without even knowing the name.
“There is undoubtedly in this choice the fear of losing one’s independence within the couple or a desire to keep it or regain it, for example in a couple whose children have grown up and who wants to regain personal independence without leave. This can also be explained by our personality, a bad experience as a couple in the past, or even because our education has led us to not want to recreate a classic model of a couple. Others who have also lived together for a long time will want to reach a new stage in their relationship and rekindle the flame.”
Just as many reasons to follow your instincts and create a couple on new, non-traditional bases if you are happy that way.
What are the advantages and limitations of this new kind of couple?
Not encroaching on one’s living space turns out to be a solution for some. When both people are convinced that this model can preserve them, the celicouple can indeed have beneficial effects.
“The advantage of the celicouple is that the two lovers learn not to burden the other with all their little quirks, their habits, which can be annoying in everyday life and to keep the good times. It also allows them to respect the need of solitude and independence of each person.”
However, it is not suitable for everyone, and can even prove problematic if it is only a sign of a desire to distance ourselves…”Its limit is that this independence becomes a new living environment, which no longer allows the couple to flourish.”
The couple must therefore decide on healthy bases, which suit everyone, while respecting the needs of both partners, and must not be imposed or suffered, like a constraint. It should give wings, not stop your momentum.
Slide: Couple: 8 symptoms of burnout within the relationship