I wanted to be really bad, but the game rubs it all in me

Baldur’s Gate 3 offers many options for how you approach the game. Whether good or bad, secretly or outright: everyone goes their own way. MeinMMO editor Benedict Grothaus is currently attempting a sneaky-evil run and quite often has to swallow hard…

I’ve been playing Pen & Paper for well over 10 years and almost always evil characters for the last few years. It just fits better in a dirty, unfair world when you indulge yourself in the lack of law and control.

A quick stab in the throat tends to end an argument quicker and more comfortably than a night in jail. For me at least. Similarly, when I played Baldur’s Gate 3 for the first time, I said to myself that I wanted to check out the insane killer, the “Dark Urge.”

Aside from a few scenes that are pretty nasty but have a grotesque sense of humor, I rarely encountered a “duty” to be evil. But it got really bad when I consciously let myself be carried away to dark deeds.

The game never tires of reminding me that I am behaving in an absolutely morally unacceptable manner. And to a degree that shows Larian really wants you to realize how evil you are. Choice isn’t just a conversational option, it’s a commitment.

SPOILER WARNING! I’m detailing the events of Act 1 and Act 2 as well as the personal development of Dark Desire and Shadowheart. If you don’t want to know anything about it, don’t read any further. Instead, here’s how I’m playing my villain. And a little more bear sex as a buffer:

Every misdeed will be held against me – and hard

The Dark Desire made me kick a squirrel against a tree so hard it leaves a bloody mess and cut off Gale’s hand. That permanently cost me a companion that I no longer get.

Both are still situations in which I had to laugh despite the macabre situation. Brutal, but also kind of funny. In the end, however, I was faced with an important decision: do I save the refugees in the Emerald Grove, or do I betray them and slaughter them all?

My plan was to recruit the Drow Minthara as companions. Nevertheless, I did everything I could to save the refugees, with the result that it just didn’t work. I had to murder everyone. Not even “non-lethal attacks” helped.

A difficult decision, especially since at the end of the carnage there is a cave full of civilians who are only fleeing, not fighting back. They also have to die for the quest to end. I know two of them: a couple in love who wanted to start a new life.

Only at one point did I have to pause the game for a moment and take a deep breath. A gang of kids is hiding underground. Thieves whose guild I even sponsored. Again, no one survived: the goblins killed everyone. Even the nice bard was there, with whom I fell in love – apparently as a last line of defense against the killers.

Curiosity drove me to loot. The children all had toys with them. That alone made for a queasy feeling. But it got really bad when I found a letter from one of the children. I saved the little guy from harpies shortly before. For him I was a “fortune knight”, he wanted to be like me. I was his idol – and then his executioner.

“Hey, remember that kid you killed?”

That alone was tough stuff. Right, really hard stuff. But Baldur’s Gate 3 is unforgiving. I’ve come to terms with my decision: it’s an evil walkthrough, so I’m evil.

Soon I’m in the Underrealms and near the River Styx, which transports the souls of the dead across different realms. Here I find the message in a bottle from a Tiefling boy. The name happened to stick in my memory: he too was a sacrifice at the slaughter festival.

The letter is addressed to his father. The boy hopes to meet him again at Baldur’s Gate once he gets there, talks of his wishes and dreams once he’s in the big city. Apparently he tells all this to his dead father.

None of those dreams ever come true, I took them away from him. Not directly with my blade, but it was still me who opened the gate for the goblins.

Maybe it’s better this way, Cortyn:

So much violence and death, and for what?

The choices keep nagging at me, but the further I get in the game, the better I come to terms with them. Because: it’s what my character would do. He is power hungry, wants revenge, power at any price.

I give myself to the dark desires, I have to kill bloodthirsty for it. One night a bard comes into my camp and I eviscerate it. The reward comes a few hours later: a new battle form, a bestial demon that shreds everything.

And my companions also agree. Astarion, Minthara, Shadowheart and Lae’zel still follow me. Everyone else fled. And they like my way so much that they all even want to sleep with me. I created an absolutely evil group.

I even help Shadowheart kill a defenseless angel incarnate in order to claim her goddess’ power for herself. A dark crusade against Selûne and the Shar Church begins, Shadowheart seeks to “cleanse” her own community. A tough step, but something that fits my story perfectly.

Whenever I’m off work, I look forward to experiencing more of the world, I want to know what’s going on. At the same time, every second of the game I’m arguing with myself about how far I’m really willing to go.

Baldur’s Gate 3 is 18+ and for good reason. The game tells adult stories that go well beyond, “Haha, they’re having sex without censorship!” Rarely do I experience storytelling in a game that comes close to that of my favorite authors. Larian did it. Chapeau.

Incidentally, the Dark Desire is a role that inspires many people in our editorial team. What that says about us…I don’t know. At least Schuhmann likes it:

I started Baldur’s Gate 3 twice and was disappointed: I didn’t like it until I did what many warn against