It was a year ago, the novelist Marie-Sabine Roger published Last visit to my mother(L’Iconoclaste), a little book weighing its weight of emotions, the story of an end of life that resembles a long rout. That of his mother, who died in an Ehpad, at the age of 94, on February 18, 2020. A text of raw beauty, through which the author of Thirty-six candles, of The Fallen Head and Get well soon, L’Express 2012 readers’ prize (screened by Jean Becker), has found the right words to deal with such a universal subject. Suffice to say that the publication of Gravediggers, by journalist Victor Castenet, implacable testimony on institutionalized abuse in Ehpad, revived his memories, and his anger. Interview with a novelist who does not handle the language of wood.
L’Express: Les Fossoyeurs, the shock investigation book on nursing homes just published, echoes your story Last visit to my mother. It brings back bad memories…
Marie-Sabine Roger: Indeed, but I am delighted with the scandal that this book triggers. I don’t know which group belonged to my mother’s private nursing home located in the Gard, but in any case, what is happening with Orpéa is happening with many other groups. That there is an extremely mercantile aspect behind all this is obvious. My mother paid around 3,000 euros a month, which is not bad. Out of curiosity, I have just returned to the page of the site of the house in question, which mentions, among other things, the 12,000 square meter park, a pretty dining room with wonderful plates, etc. The lark mirror! In fact, they bring up things that, to be honest, are of no use to most residents. The latter remain in their room, in their armchair and strut the marble floor of the entrance. What matters is the staff. And the quality of food and care. That’s all ! I am not saying that people should be housed in a hovel, but there is a lot of publicity for things that reassure families when that is not the main thing.
So it was a personnel problem?
In my book, I said it and I say it again, I don’t judge the staff, who did what they could. But he was often understaffed and poorly trained. I remember a young caregiver I called one day because my mother wanted to move from the chair to her bed. He didn’t know how to go about it, even though it’s the basics of the job. Obviously, he hadn’t been trained at all. I also noticed a very high turnover, I saw very new faces for two years, which destabilizes the residents. For meals, it wasn’t brilliant either. there were several services, including one at 5 p.m. – my mother’s. Once finished, or rather swallowed, the meal, they put her to bed. This is not a life. During the day, we took my mother up to her room, we put her in front of the TV when she saw very badly, we put the sound on full blast even though she was not deaf, and she had no remote control to change channels. For whole days, she was subjected to sounds that she had not chosen. The nursing home is old age at its worst. Old age squared. The worst part is that most families don’t always realize this. Or dare not moan for fear that the patient will suffer. The families then enter into an unbearable paranoia, trying to imagine what is happening during their absence. Imagine a kindergarten where children are suspected of being beaten, there would be an outcry.
You also mention in your story the rapid loss of autonomy…
When my mother arrived, she was still walking a little with a walker and she was going to the toilet accompanied. In two months, it was settled, she was in a wheelchair and she had diapers! Because there were not enough staff to support him. This is what happens in all nursing homes. For lack of time, we put protection on them, which we change when we can. There is dehumanization and a total lack of dignity there. Most caregivers are aware of all this, but they can’t, they just don’t have the time. And doctors are involved in that kind of thing. When my mother arrived, the resident next door was screaming every two minutes, which was unbearable. After a few months, my mother started to cry too, very quietly. As a result, we stopped making her do activities and we ended up leaving her in her room and, above all, we medicated her so that she wouldn’t bother anyone.
“In two months, it was settled, she was in a wheelchair and she had diapers!”
What kind of drugs were they?
She was loaded like a mule, sorry for the expression. She had amazing treatment. I talked about it with the doctor and told him: “I don’t understand, my mother has nightmares and she has a medicine that can give nightmares, she has insomnia and there is a medicine that can give nightmares, she has anxieties and she is receiving a drug that can create feelings of anxiety, explain to me…” He was embarrassed, he said to me “well, suddenly, she’s calmed down, she’s sleeping, and then in any case, the coordinating doctor would have given him a diaper”. Anyway, my mother was on drugs. Depending on the time I arrived, she was no longer in a condition to speak with me. However, there is little time left in front of you and you realize that this time is partly kidnapped by a kind of medicinal straightjacket. I can’t help but tell myself that she would have had a much more dignified and happier end of life if she hadn’t gone to nursing home.
Where does this violence come from?
It does not come from people, but from the institution. On the site of my mother’s establishment, they announce 50 staff, including 26 caregivers. 26 carers (in 3×8) for 90 patients, that makes, in the best case, 12 staff members at a time T for 90 elderly people who all require care and attention. We have to stop with these large structures that accommodate 90 or 100 residents and create many small structures, mainly public or associative. We come out of this ordeal saying to ourselves “never that for me, out of pity”. Some say “but the children don’t have to abandon their parents”. There is no question of abandonment, people are in such a state of dependence that it is just impossible to take care of it yourself. Think of the poor spouse forced to place their husband or wife.
You wrote this story to throw a stone into the pond?
I wrote it first for myself, then my editor told me that this text could speak to many people. And it’s true that it aroused a number of reactions; I realized that the intimate constantly joins the universal. Suddenly, we wonder how long we will still wait without anything moving. I am scandalized by the fact that we sell rooms in Ehpad to make investments. Because it pays off! Because it pays off _ that’s for sure, the room will never be empty! I am not an angel but here we reach something that is appallingly cynical. How not to get angry? This is a question that society must take seriously and not let these questions be managed by people who are only looking to make a profit. We don’t need hotel chains, we need healthcare facilities.
Interview by Marianne Payot