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Apologizing when you have made a mistake is one thing. Excusing yourself for being (being yourself, being here, being different, etc.) is, on the other hand, a fault that should be stopped quickly in order to be more fulfilled. Here are nine things you should never apologize for, according to psychologists.
“I’m sorry)”, Do you say this sentence a little too often for your liking? It generally reflects embarrassment, a lack of confidence or a feeling of helplessness. However, in most cases you simply don’t have to apologize. Lachlan Brown, psychologist and author, recently listed 9 specific situations in which you should never feel the need to apologize, in his media Hack Spirit. “It’s not about being rude or dismissive, but rather recognizing the value of our actions and respecting them.” Here they are.
Be yourself
Often we find ourselves apologizing for our personality, interests, or choices that don’t conform to society’s norms or expectations. Yet we should never have to apologize for being true to ourselves, for being introverted, or extroverted depending on the situation, or for enjoying an activity that no one is passionate about.
“Apologizing for who you are can undermine your self-esteem and hinder your personal growth. Stop saying ‘I’m sorry’ for being you. Instead, celebrate your individuality and never apologize for it. C “is an essential part of who you are”, explains the expert.
Put your beliefs into practice
Beliefs (religious, spiritual, etc.) are often a taboo aspect of the personality because they encourage individuals to seek their own path, even if this goes against the norms or expectations of society. But according to psychologists, our beliefs, whether religious, spiritual or philosophical, constitute an important part of our identity. “Apologizing for our beliefs implies a rejection of our values and can lead to feeling of guilt and conflict within us” he continues. After all, being true to one’s beliefs is a fundamental aspect of self-respect and personal integrity.
Say no
Knowing how to set limits is an important condition for being yourself and thriving. Whether it’s declining an invitation, withdrawing from a project you don’t have time for, or refusing to chat, you should never have to apologize for saying no. “We often fear the word “no” because we fear disappointing others or being seen as worthless. But the truth is that saying yes when we mean no can lead to stress, resentment, and burnout. Don’t apologize for protecting your time and energy.”
Prioritize yourself
Do you think taking time for yourself can be seen as selfishness? However, it is essential to prioritize our own well-being. Too often we feel guilty for putting ourselves first. We apologize for taking time out to take care of ourselves or to pursue our own dreams and ambitions. “But as I point out in my book, taking care of yourself is not only a right, but also a responsibility. When we put ourselves first, we are able to better serve others.” evokes Lachlan Brown. A good reminder to avoid burnout.
Not knowing everything
In a society that highly values knowledge and expertise, this may seem counterintuitive, but you should never apologize for not knowing everything. “Many of us feel embarrassed that we don’t have all the answers and often apologize for it. But embracing the unknown is a key part of personal growth. Admitting our limitations is a sign of self-awareness and intellectual humility – qualities crucial for lifelong learning and development.” he maintains. When you’re faced with a question or situation that you don’t have an answer to, don’t apologize. Instead, think of it as an opportunity to learn something new. And let’s play it down: no one knows everything about everything.
Express your emotions
In our society, certain emotions, such as anger or sadness, are often perceived as negative. Sometimes we may even feel compelled to apologize for expressing them. But why then? Indeed, psychologists agree that all emotions are essential and healthy components of the human experience. If it’s not about yelling at everyone, sure, but it’s also harmful to act like you don’t have any emotion at all. “Suppression of emotions can lead to increased stress, decreased mental well-being and even physical health problems. It is crucial to allow ourselves to fully experience our feelings and express them appropriately.” recalls the expert.
Make mistakes
If we can apologize for the consequences of a decision, which affected those around us for example, we should not be ashamed of our mistakes. For what ? Because they provide opportunities for growth and learning. “When we make a mistake, it means we push the limits and try new things. Perfection is not the goal – continued growth is.” So accept that you have been imperfect and do something concrete about it.
To take up space
It may seem a little counterintuitive, but you should never apologize for taking up space, whether physically, emotionally, or conversationally. “Many of us have been conditioned to make ourselves smaller, quieter or less conspicuous to avoid disturbing others. But psychologists say this can lead to lowered self-esteem.”
A quick reminder for the assembly: whether in your family, your professional environment, or any group, you have as much right to be here and express yourself as anyone else. So don’t apologize for your presence or for asserting your opinions and needs.
Good in his body, good in his head!
Pursue your passion
If you have found a passion that transports you, again, don’t apologize, even if it doesn’t fit with those around you or surprises them. Never mind ! “Having a passion or passions is essential to our happiness and well-being, because they energize you, give you purpose and contribute to your personal growth. And who knows? Your unique path and individuality might also inspire others to pursue their dreams. Not really anything to be ashamed of!
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